Transcript for #1505 - Hannibal Buress

Hello, Hannibal. What's happening, man? You had to see my friend. Good to see you, too. It's been a while. Last time I saw you was in Thailand.

Yeah.

That was very random. That's so crazy. We had dinner hung out in Thailand. I was like, this is wild. Yeah.

Yeah, that's crazy. So you just decided, just up and decided, I'm gonna go there by myself. Yeah. For several months. Just a month. Oh, you went for a month. Yeah. And trained more time.

What was that? Did you ever train more time before that?

How into did you get? Did you ever, were you ever like hitting the pounds going, I think I actually take a fight?

It's not a thing that comes easily, especially, you know, when you're in your 30s and you just start in a train. Yeah. Like, my tie is there's like the to move your legs like that and that kind of dexterity takes a while. It's a slow gradual build up.

But you seem normal when you're walking around. How are you both? Because I know some dudes that are really bolego.

And what causes bow legiveness is that a anatomy thing? Is it just a anatomy thing?

I'm not seeing anything weird.

Hmm, I could help you with that. I guarantee you I bet some stretches and some learning how to do it slowly. The thing about roundhouse kicks and any kicks in general is people try to do them like fast and you really want to learn them slow. You got to resist the urge to try to hit things. What you really want to do is just go through the motion, just go through the motion, just slow and do that for a long period of time, like many, many, many weeks. Okay. Before it is guys trying to like, and then you want to kick it up and you put all the strain on your ligaments and your supporting leg because you're not pivoting. They fucked themselves. And then it's hard to unlearn that. See, when you learn something, if you learn it wrong, like why is it teach? The worst students were students that learned something wrong. You would think like, oh, I already have five years of karate in this net. And I'm like, oh, great. This should be good. It was never good. It was the opposite. You're better off taking a young kid. with no experience at all. They can get way better way faster, because they don't have any bad habits, because as soon as you get nervous, or as soon as you get tired, you go right back to your bad habits. You go back to your, see if they'll relearn everything. This episode is brought to you by Zippercruiter. Look, patience is good at all. But if you're just sitting around waiting for everything good to come your way, well, You're going to be disappointed and you're going to miss out on some amazing opportunities like your dream vacation. You have to work, save that money and actually plan it out. It's never going to happen if you just sit on your couch at home thinking about it and the same applies to your company. You don't want to miss out on hiring the best people for your team and luckily there's an easy solution that you can use. It's Zippercouter. Try it for free right now at zippercouter.com slash rogan. They'll find you qualified people for your role quickly. And once you find someone you like, Zippercouter can help put you at the front of the pack. Just use their pre-written invite to apply message to connect with your favorite candidates ASAP. So, let ZipperCruiter give you the hiring hustle that you need. See why, four out of five employers who post on ZipperCruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. Just go to zippercruiter.com slash rogan to try it for free. Again, that zippercruiter.com slash rogan. zipper cruder, the smartest way to hire. This episode is brought to you by Robin Hood. You want financial security for you and your family? Well, you gotta make it happen. The world doesn't owe you a living and that's how I've always approached my finances and you can too with Robin Hood. Robin Hood pioneered commission-free stock trading over a decade ago, and they continued to offer innovative products to help you maximize your money's potential. With over 23 million funded customers, Robin Hood is helping people build a better financial future. Robin Hood gives you complete autonomy to make investments to pursue your future goals, whatever they are. Maybe you want to look towards investing for your family's future, investing for retirement, or even a vacation to the Bahamas. We all have some bucket list items to cross off and Robin Hood has tools to help you pursue them. Investing a small amount now could make a big difference 30 years down the road. Take control of your financial future with Robin Hood. Download the app or visit Robinhood.com to learn more. Disclosure. Investing involves risk and loss of principle is possible. Returns are not guaranteed. Other fees may apply. Robinhood Financial LLC member SIPC is a registered broker dealer.

It is, it is kind of feels wrong, but it's their culture, and it's also how a lot of the families make money. I mean, they literally send their kid off to the camp.

Well, first of all, it's very inexpensive to go to the fights. You know that. Everything's inexpensive in Thailand. And I mean, everybody's wearing flip flops, right? It's an interesting place. Like, my friend John Lynn Parr went there when he was a boy. He was a young teenager and lived there, lived as a monk. You know, he's a Australian, multiple-time world-moy-type champion. And he spent like a good deal of his time growing up there. and really embraced the culture. And he's like, they're just, first of all, it's the land of smiles. Like everyone's, everyone's friendly. Like one of the things I noticed there, like people are genuinely very friendly. There's very little materialism there. People are generally happy with like wearing a pair of shorts. It's never cold out. So you could wear shorts and flip flops. And that's how everybody's walking around. And I don't think there's a lot of money in the business. You know, I think there's a king takes it. King takes it. King takes a lot. Remember we took a picture in front of the king? We did. We got a picture in front. I was like, I don't know if we should post this. Like you and me post smiling in front of a picture of the king. Like you might get in trouble for that. There's weird rules over there for the king.

Maybe what's that in the one that lost all the money? Quibi? What is it called? Is that it? Quibi? Yeah. Maybe get on that.

Do you see that shit with his mistress? He had an official mistress, but she fucked up and she got demoted. And so she had like bow down in front of him and front of everybody. Like she was talking shit. Like the mistress probably wanted to be the queen. Like, look at her there. She's like begging for forgiveness. Oh, my god. He makes mistress lie at his feet. And make her as what does it say?

That was when she was the official concubine, attended by his, what, look at their wife and all capitals. But then he demoted her. This is, this is when she became the official concubine. And by the way, I think that was the first time anybody had an official concubine like a hundred years.

She had a lie down at the feet. Let it look! Fuck you! It's weird like the kids look only Boller. That's Boller. He's the only Boller. The only Boller. Everyone else is just kind of normal there.

Oh, the wife had to do the same shit. Wow, and she's pouring tea on her head. What is that? What?

Very odd. A good for him. They seem to love him. She used to be that.

Bodyguard. Former bodyguard. Okay.

That's a microphone cover. Take that. That's this. That's this.

I did enjoy Thailand though. I enjoyed it a lot. It's a good time.

The crap top. What is this? The monarch even threatened to sue Facebook over the startling shots taken in 2016 by a passerby who recognized the king. Oh, that's the king. Oh, the class. Wait a minute. So psycho. Well, she she has to wear the crazy hat. Oh, he's a sports board. He's a muted. Oh, he can't get it.

Yeah, it's all. Yeah, just is. So that's just how he likes to rock it. He likes tank tops that shows belly button. That's cool. It's cultural. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool.

That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's cool. Me and Mar. I want to go see, have you ever seen Lettwey? Do you know what that is? No. That's like if you think tie-boxing is extreme, they take it another level. Lettwey, they use headbutts and they kick you when you're down. They do all kinds of crazy shit.

It's intense. So we are David Laduk who's the king of Lettwey. He came on the podcast. He's a wild man. He's a wild man. Yeah, I think about. Oh, they're bad enough. Oh, too.

That's this is how they do. Okay. The baracles. They just it's basically like moly tie, but way where more hardcore. Like see that you can near dude on the when he's on his way down. It's just it's way more hardcore. It's like one more level of hardcore and headbutts, a lot of headbutts. Yeah, but they basically use all the techniques of Moetai, but they just take it to a totally different level.

Yeah. was uh, it uncomfortable after that.

Yeah, there's something about women that can fight. Like, oh, that's an extra element of danger. Yeah, she, a woman who can fuck you up. Like a hot chick who can fuck you up is like, oh, that's, that's nerve wracking. like if you're a woman like a holly home or like a you know world champion kickbox or woman like how what kind of man do you date like you got a date another savage yeah a date of fighter you have to they can't they can't respect regular people they'll fuck you up unless they separate not a problem unless they they dominate you like to hold you down make you either person just grab you by the back of the head and

Drip, drip, drip. It's probably a lot of guys who are into that though. You know, dudes are in the getting kicked in the balls. They're in the all kinds of weird shit. You can find somebody out there that's in there, everything. They're getting kicked.

Have you seen the videos of guys that are in the getting kicked in the balls by women? No. Oh my God. I don't want to show it to you. No, they're getting kicked in the balls and getting their ball stomped on by stilettos. That's like a whole category of like pain and torture. Like all those BDSM folks, you know, yeah.

Because I don't have to have extremes. Look, I love Jim Norton to death, but he likes checks pissing on him and all kinds of crazy shit. People are in a weird stuff, man. People live in out there, man.

Yeah. I've been hearing some crazy shit about you. Well, you. And I've been hearing that you are making a move. Like a very, very unusual move. to a very strange place. It's very unusual for a man from Chicago to just... up and take off.

I think I bought four. That's a good investment. Yeah. With a lot of money.

Well, it's last time you did stand up.

Me too. I went to Denver. Two weeks ago, I did Houston. How's that? Weird. Yeah. We at first show was weird. Second show was normal. Second show was a show. First show was like, I can't believe I'm gonna do stand up again. Do you know Moses primed Moses? Yeah. Gross battle. Me Moses and Tony Hitchcliffe. We went to the Houston improv. It was awesome. We had a good time. It was really fun, man. It was like the old days, but I got worried about And I was like, man, I don't want to catch this shit. Like, is this worth it? Like, why am I, what am I doing? And then Houston, while we were there, they got this thing that they're moving back to stage one. So they're, they're going back. So they're shutting all the bars down. Restaurants were down to 50% capacity. And I was like, look, you know, we're not in the crowd. The, the stage of the, you've been the Houston improv.

It's my first time ever. Okay. It's nice. Yes. It's nice place and it's got a high stage. So you're above everybody. It's not like they're spitting in your face. You're above them. Everyone was wearing masks. So I was like, this is probably safe, but. afterwards, you know, it's just odd. It was just odd and I was like, I don't want it. I don't want to get sick and most importantly, I don't want to get anyone sick. Right. So I was like, you know, my wife's mom lives down the street for a month and I don't, you know what I mean?

Yeah, I got back. I immediately got tested. And when I was clean, I was like, that's it. I'm canceling everything for a while. Until they come up with some sort of a treatment or until herd immunity is kicked into the point where the virus is dropped down to a very low level of viral load and people aren't getting real sick. It's just... If everybody was healthy, I would have no worry. But I don't want unhealthy people to die or old people to die. Yeah, it's so complicated, man. You know, I have a few friends. I have like nine friends that have got it. Yeah. And everyone's fine. But what if they weren't? You know, I mean, there's a lot of people that aren't. It's scary. It's weird. And we were just like, Jamie and I were just reading this story about, uh, is it from the UK? I think it was the mirror. All these people that they're finding that have very minimal symptoms, but then they have this brain disease. Damn. Yeah, like some inflammation of the brain and some of them had to be on anti-psychosis medicine. One lady, what did she saw? Lions in her fucking house? Yeah, a new study that potentially warned that potentially deadly brain disorders may be a symptom of COVID-19, even in people with otherwise mild disease. The research published today by the journal Brain looked at 40 adult patients with COVID-19 in the UK, finding that they showed symptoms of a wide range of serious brain diseases. Many of the patients had only mild, typical COVID-19 symptoms, such as fever or respiratory issues and for some, their neurological symptoms were the only sign that they were sick. 155-year-old woman with no known current or historical mental illness was admitted to a hospital with recognized COVID-19 symptoms including fever, cough, and muscle aches. She was discharged after two weeks, having been treated with oxygen, but four days later her husband reported she was confused and behaving strangely. She then experienced hallucinations reporting that lions and monkeys. She was seeing lions and monkeys in her house and became delusional and aggressive with her family and hospital staff. She was treated with anti-psychotic medication and her symptoms improved over the course of three weeks, although the study does not confirm whether she made a full recovery. Yes, pretty bonkers right there. This fucking disease is bonkers because for some people it ain't shit right. I know some people that were asymptomatic. They went through the whole thing with nothing. They had like they tested positive. They didn't feel it. They, they, they, they chilled. They just quarantined for two weeks. They got retested. They don't have it anymore. They never felt anything. And then I know other people that months later, they can't go up flights of stairs. They're exhausted all the time. They keep they got no motivation. They're just everything feels just the world's like, they got to wait vest on everywhere they go.

You know what I'm going to do? Show me the outfit. Come on man.

I love the idea. I love it. Especially now, right? You just release a special. It's available free on YouTube right now. Yeah. So, like, what better way to come up with new material than living Ghana for a few months right before the world explodes? Because it's going to fucking explode no matter who wins, man. I'm nervous to be here no matter who wins.

The only way that would ever work is if whoever his running weight was was preferable to him and everybody was excited about it. Like someone who you would have voted for anyway and we don't even know who the running mate is right now. I was of today July 8th. We don't know who that is. But if the running mate is preferable to him and like good he's going to be a woman good give it to her let her run it. If it's like that maybe it would be okay. But he's not even around. He's hiding somewhere. He's in a basement.

Well, when Reagan was president, he was the oldest president before Trump.

Yeah, he wound up getting Alzheimer's, right? Was it Alzheimer's? Uh, this episode is brought to you by Mizzon and Maine. No matter where you're listening, no matter what job you have, the clothes you wear to work say a lot about you. And if you're wearing boring, stiff, uncomfortable dress shirts, well, now might be the time to ditch some of the dated boring styles in your workplace wardrobes. And that's exactly what Mizzon and Maine is for. When I wear my shirt, I feel like I'm not sacrificing comfort for style. They're performance fabric, dress shirts, feel just as good as they look. And you could put on a misdemean and dress for the job you have. You will see it hanging in your closet and genuinely get excited to put it on. And if you're still dry cleaning your dress shirts, You're living in the past. Welcome to 2024, where a Mizzon and Maine has the world's most comfortable machine washable dress shirts. Mizzon and Maine invented the performance fabric dress shirt 10 years ago, and they've practically perfected the thing. It's lightweight, breathable, moisture-wicking, wrinkle resistant, and the most comfortable shirt on the market. Whatever you do, and wherever you wear it, know that you'll look and feel amazing. Shop now at masoninmain.com and save 20% when you spend $130 or more using the promo code Joe Rogan. This episode is brought to you by Moan. Homes are a big investment. You want to protect them from fires, break-ins, and especially water. Water damage is a lot more frequent. And something is small as a leaky pipe can lead to big problems down the road. And it can also be hard to detect. since you know most pipes are hidden behind a wall. That's why you guys need the mowing smart water monitor and shut off. It's a device that can automatically shut down your home's water when a leak is detected and it also works 24-7 monitoring and tracking your home even when you're not there. It'll alert you through the app at the first sign of a leak, providing ultimate peace of mind and security. Learn more and buy the Moan Smart Water Monitor and shut off at moan.com slash flow. And right now, use the code rogue in to get 5% off free shipping and a free leak detector. That's code rogan at m-o-e-n dot com slash f-l-o. Automatic shutoff in real time alert capabilities will operate when the device is configured with the proper settings. I think dementia. I'll just never forget when I was an open-micer. It was like 1988. There's a guy named Jimmy Tingle. It was a Boston comedy legend. He had this joke about Reagan on trial because Reagan was on trial and they asked him if he ever sold arms to Iran. And he said he couldn't remember. And Jimmy Tingle was like, Mr. President, if you ever sell arms to people who hate us, jot it down. Make a note. Put it on your refrigerator.

Yeah, and he went out and we thought he was bullshit. Like we were like, she's just pretending. He doesn't remember. But then in the end, he didn't remember anything. Like who knows if you remember that?

I say that, but then I was willing to vote for Bernie Sanders. I was a Bernie Sanders supporter before he lost in the primaries. I felt like his policies were interesting. It could be an interesting way to shake up the country. Let's put focus on human beings and people and communities instead of just money and for an interventionalist wars.

No, he's the only one.

It's tough on us. Exactly. Yeah, when I got back from Houston, I had not done stand up in a long time and I was exhausted on Sunday. I was like, fuck man, I forgot how tiring the shit is. Yes, multiple flights. Getting up in the morning, all that shit. I am very curious now that this gelane Maxwell guy or lady got arrested you know the Jeffrey Epstein's Confident what first of all how quick before they kill her second of all if they don't kill her what is she gonna say and who's going down because there's a lot of people going down Is is pretty bonkers why is that the election You think you had effect the other? 100%. 100%. Yeah. How does that sound? Well, first of all, Trump used to hang out with that guy. His picture with Melania and Trump and Jeffrey Epstein and Galane and Fox News cut out Trump. They cut the edited the picture. So the Trump wasn't in the picture and they're like, well, we made him stay. Like, bet you didn't make a mistake. There's the picture. They were posing, partying together.

That's a good question. What's up? Yeah, you know, he had a picture of Bill Clinton in a dress in the foyer of his house. It's a crazy picture like you are my bitch because he had Clinton flew with him like 26 times. Look at that. That's a picture. That's a real picture that was in the foyer of his house. How crazy is that? That's a real picture man. My friend Eric Weinstein has seen that picture in real life. That's a real painting. Painting. Yeah, not a photo. Painting. Sorry.

He made him. He made it to let him know. Bitch. I own you. I mean, that's what I'm a man. Look, we're friends. And then you came on my house and I got a painting. Hey, Hannibal, I want to show you something. You want to dress if you and I have been partying together and I flew you to some island and we fuck kids together and then you came on my house and there's a painting you want to dress you be like what have I done?

Just coming with a best draft up with dynamite.

It's so action. It's so crazy because it's one of those things where you would hear about that from like the craziest conspiracy theorists. Like bro, there's an island. They take all these elites and they have these underage girls on the silent. You're like, Get the fuck outta here with this crazy talk. That is so, that's crazy talk. And then you find a way that's true. And they had scientists there and lawyers there and politicians there. Like, what? There really was an island. Like, they had the prince. What's his name? Prince Andrew. Prince Andrew was there?

I don't remember. Yeah, he was like, I don't hug. I'm a royal. Royals don't hug.

Well, there's an interview with him. I forget who the woman was. It was interviewing him. But when you're watching the interview, you're like, holy shit, why did you do this? Like, you know that you're guilty and you agreed to do this interview? Like, this isn't even the cops. This is like a reporter and you're talking to this reporter and you're clearly full of shit and really nervous. This is great. The whole thing's crazy.

But it's also it's royal confidence right they have they have real well they also have crazy libel laws in the UK like they can get away with a lot over there because like they get sue you for all kinds of shit and the royal family I'm sure's extremely litigious this is the whole story is paradise jelaine Maxwell as allegedly secret video footage of Prince Andrew oh Jesus Pornhub here we come It just seems like we're in a movie man. It's like the movie just keeps getting crazier and crazier.

Yeah, my friend Rutledge, Rutledge, he's the host of that. He's a car guy. Shout out to Rutledge. Yeah, my kids love that show.

Yeah, those are the kind of things that are very popular at times like this. We want cartoons almost. We want things that are silly. No stakes.

I don't think people are supposed to take in the news of the whole world. I think it's very bad for you. I think most of the news you're going to get is the news of things that are dangerous. So if you're getting things that are dangerous all over the world, so it gives you a distorted perception of the current danger around you.

And they just, uh, he just says cheating like what if someone oils the marbles to the get.

They just, that's new. They've gotten bacon. It's gone for us now. Yeah. That's happened over the past few months. But, yeah. This video was a million views of Marbles? Oh, yeah. Yeah, he had a commentary. The commentary is what it... Desperately, trying to better their last Audi.

It's like it's real, I bet. It's a cheating detail.

But there's no people at all and look at the stands. There's Marbles in the stands. Yeah. We're losing our fucking minds. We're losing our fucking minds.

Uh, is that's oddly compelling.

Yeah, some people are designed to be a commentator for marble races. That's the thing. Look at this one. Let's go look at a little elevator. Escalator takes you to the top and conveyor belt. What's that, Jim?

That's so crazy. That is so crazy. A bunch of people watching marbles while the world burns. What's got his own album? Yeah, I get it. I get it. So Ghana, have you been before?

Look, you're not married. You don't have kids. This is the time to do it. Fuck it. Why not? You know, and you've been very smart with your money. I know you invested real estate. So you've got a bunch of shit going on. It's making you money. Why not? Fuck it? Go. It's the good move. I like it. I like the idea just of doing something like that where you completely take yourself out of the normal life. because for a creative person, I think you can run dry, like in terms of inspiration and experiences. You know, obviously there's a lot of chaos around us right now, so there's a lot of things to draw from, but something like going to Ghana.

Is anybody getting tested?

We get tested. Uh, yeah. You want your tested today? I can get you tested. Sure. Okay. All right. I'm going to get tested right now. I'm going to make well we're worse in the air. You are made. Okay. I'm going to schedule it right now.

It requires a little work, but there's something there.

Now, when you go to Ghana, do you have a plan of what you're planning on doing? Or what do you want to just go there and write? Do you want to go there and just experience life?

Are there regular flights there? Or because a lot of places are quarantined. Like I know some people try to go to Italy and they found out, you know, even though they're letting people back in Italy, they won't let Americans.

But I mean, would it be hard to catch a flight? How many flights are going to Ghana right now?

They're really into curling up there. I did a show up there and I made fun of curling and people started going, hey! They were mad. They were mad. You know what I think of Newfoundland? I think of Pull up this photo of Johnny Cash, Moose Hunting, and Newfoundland. Here's another photo that we need to get turned into when the big metal prints. There's a Johnny Cash wearing like regular clothes like an old school rifle like 1965 or some shit like that moves hunting and there he is. Hey Johnny Cash and Newfoundland. There he is. Look at that. That's the photo. That's the one. That's the one we need.

Is that a guitar gun? No. That's just a gun gun. That's a moose head right there, son. A lot of moose and new from them. Look at that walkie talkie thing. He was a baller with that thing packed in. Is that's like a refrigerator with an antenna.

Look at them hold it on to it. That's crazy. They probably use them to locate game. Call them in. Call them in. You got to pretend that you're a female moose that wants some dick. Is how you call them and you got to go. That's the mooscop? Yeah, that's what it sounds like.

They slow walk. They don't trust you. Yeah. They come slowly and they make their way around. Usually they circle. You could call a moose in and it could take hours before it comes to you. Like you could call a moose in and then it gets dark and you're in your tent. You hear something stomping around the tent. It's a moose looking for pussy.

Well, you really can't, you can't see it. And the dark in the woods, it's fucking dark. Like you can't really take an ethical shot unless the moon's out and most places have laws against that. Okay. Yeah, I love to shoot at night.

That's how they sound like that's how bad they want dick.

You want to have a shot that you know for certain you're going to hit the animal in the vitals and it's going to die. If you just take a shot at an animal that's really far away, you can barely see it. That's an unethical shot. You might hit it, but you might not. What you really want is an animal that's like standing still broadside. So you want it standing, because if it's to animal standing straight at you, you have to hit it right here. You have a very small, like maybe a softball size, or, no, like a cantaloupe. Like a cantaloupe size area that you can hit where the heart is. But if, unless you have a rifle, if you have a rifle opens up a realm of possibilities, I'll take a frontal shot with a rifle. But if an animal standing broadside, then you have a very large area that you can hit.

Do it. Please. I fucking hate this life. Do it. This bitch is a moment. I thought I'd get there. Another moose is always there. I'm depressed. I hate my job. And when they walk in, they make noises. That's what the moose does. The male moose, the bull.

It's one of the few animals that like anybody can make the noise. You can make an elk noise. Elk noises are hard. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He's not only guy that's made a career out of noises. Like if you say like a noise guy, like Michael Winslow as comedians, he's the known noise guy. Pablo a little bit. Okay, a little bit. Yeah. But either way, he's not doing an elk sound. You've heard an elk scream? No. Pull up a video of an elk scream. It sounds like some Lord of the Rings shit. It doesn't even sound like a real animal. When you hear them in real life, it like gives you goose bumps. It's like holy fuck. Like if you didn't know what was making this sound, you would think there were demons in the woods. Okay. Have you heard them scream like this? When they scream, it's the bulls. They're screaming to let the cows know what's up and to let the other bulls know to step the fuck back.

Yes.

Yeah, you ain't gonna do that one. You need a tube. You need like a phelps elk call. Phelps.

Yeah, you'll be like Kitty Dukakis.

And then the females have a different sound. They're like, meh!

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And I'm so expensive. I don't think there's a lot of value in a soundboard with animal noises.

I wish it was easier to make an app. I've looked in that have an app's made. It's fucking complicated. The air made an app? Or how did an app made?

Oh, no, my kids are addicted to that fucking game.

Oh, like all the subjects that you talk about in the comedy special?

Jamie told me that it was grand theft auto. They have places you can go, like you watch a comedy show, right? Wasn't that?

That is crazy. That is crazy. Look at this. That is crazy.

Wow. Well, in this 10-year-old graphics, too. Yeah. Like if they did this today, that's hilarious. Like the way he walks.

But look, it's a socially distance crowd. They didn't, you know, it's probably complicated in terms of animation to fill the crowd up. That's wild. That's a shitty animation though.

How strange. Split sides comedy club. yeah but the animation they have now there's a new video that's out now that's got the new unreal engine and we played it on here it doesn't even look like a video game the like you when people walk little specs of dust kick up from their feet touching the dirt well game it's what is it's a it was based like a

Watch this. Look at this. You can look at this screen too. If you want this face forward. Look at this. This shows you what all the pixels are, but this is what it looks like. I mean, what the fuck? How crazy is that? How crazy is that? That looks so amazing. Unreal Engine 3. Is that what it is? 5. 5 now. Look at that.

This is fucking crazy. So if they did that and did like you do and stand up, they could literally get it to the point where it looks like you do and stand up now. Like her movements a little odd, right? It's good. They call that the uncanny valley, the difference between reality and like obvious bullshit. It's like it gets real close to reality to it makes you feel weird watching it because your brain is going on. My watching bullshit or is this a real person? God damn, that's amazing. Like look at the graphics.

I have a real problem with video games. We have a whole video game room back there, like a LAN room. I don't even go in there anymore. I just take away from it like I'm an alcohol against a bar. I can't go in there. We, tell him, Jamie, we were playing hours every day. At the point, Jamie was telling me I had a problem. He would leave. He would like, I'm not playing anymore. But where are you going? Get back here, bitch. He would take off and go for effort. It was bad, right? It was bad. Like hours and hours every day. We would get done with the podcast. I couldn't wait to go play. I'd be like, I can't I, everybody. Run right over there, boot it up, get online, start talking shit. And we were talking crazy shit to each other. Come on, bitch. And just like killing each other, like hours and hours and hours. But before I would leave, we played Quake, Quake, Champions. My hands would be sweaty. I would feel like, like, I'm nervous. I'd leave. I'd be driving home and like, I don't feel good. I feel bad. Like I physically was feeling bad. And then I started like sleepin' bad. I was thinking, I'm putting my body through all this crazy stress. like when you're playing and you're locked onto that screen and it's like this heavy intense combat and your hands are sweating and like you're so adrenaline jacked that when you get out of there it's almost like you're drunk or you like you you just got off a drug or you drank too much coffee or something you feel terrible

I've heard about that for those role-playing games. It's just gigantic multiplayer games where you, you'll hire people and they have like sweat shops where people just play your game constantly when they play the game. Upgrade your character.

And so you pay this guy and then you came back with refresh skills.

And so if you're the park is like, you're planning against other folks. Your planning is other folks.

What does this guy do in here, Jamie?

Oh, wow.

Oh, what until you do you have to wait and line and then you get in some time.

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It's not in the computer.

It's hilarious. He's like a spider. Yeah. Oh my god. That's so funny. That is so funny. Oh my god. Of course, PC people do that. Of course. That's the same with Quake. That was always a problem. Guys that have aiming bots and they could just shoot you. Every time you showed up anywhere you would get hit, like they never missed. So you just couldn't beat them.

Oh, I do know this game. My fucking wife and my kids play the stupid game. Don't they make it hyped up during the real hyped up? It's what are you doing? It's my soul. You're playing pizza making.

I don't know. I played it once. I was like, this is stupid. It's fuck. I don't care what happens with this pizza.

And also, I've got two tests for you. The current test, if it's in your system, and also anybody tests. Okay. See if it used to be. All right. If you, you might have kicked it. A lot of people kicked it, and they didn't even know. It's really weird.

It feels like a vitamin. Maybe the best vitamin. Uh, no, uh, D is very important. D's real important. Yeah. Especially. Whoa.

Jack is get. No, I did.

How are you feeling without doing stand-up? Is it weird in you out?

First question has been doing a lot of that. Yeah. Yeah. He did one with, uh, Miss Pat and Hesus Trejo. It looked like fun, man. They're on stage and they had 700 cars. That's like, they put it instead of like 700 people in the audience. They had 700 cars. And this births got a video of it's pretty badass when the people are applauding at the end. They're hogging their horn and flashing their lights. And he said it's like a like UFO's landing. It's wild. It's all these headlights. 700 cars. Um, no, no. I mean, they did sets. I mean, they didn't like a comedy show.

Right. Look at that, Ms. Pat. Also people outside the car is kicking it. Look, man, this is wild. that looks like a lot of fun he said it was great he loved it and he said the fans were going nuts but he did some shows he did one show in Oklahoma and there was supposed to socially distant it was supposed to be 120 people in the audience there was 347 people they stuffed him into the place and he was like I don't feel safe in here like what the fuck are they doing like what did they do no one had mass on like 10 people had mass on and this is them at the end. See, this is like real social distancing, right? Now, as long as they're all tested and look at that, look at the all the crowds, like all the cars, they had fireworks. Like birds, and this was birds idea, all his idea. Driving movie theaters and making it come back now. There was a movie that's out now. This is fucking harm movie that's supposed to be real good. I forget it's like a one-word name. about a haunted house or some shit. It looks fun, but they're releasing it July 3rd in driving movie theaters and then July 10th on demand. So like they're doing everything now, like basically movies have to come out on your Apple TV or Amazon or whatever, which I love. I don't want to go to the movies, but I want the movies to stay open. Yeah.

He's going to do stand up in Ghana. Yeah, they speak a lot English there.

It makes you appreciate like norm, like one of the things about the lockdown. It makes me appreciate like meals, like sitting down, having meals with my family. We didn't, we didn't go to any restaurants at all for like three months. And then, you know, it makes you appreciate, like, like, maybe appreciate having food, because in the beginning I was thinking, like, what if we run out of food? Like, what do we do? Like, I have a gun and I have bullets and I know how to hunt. And I know where some deer are in my neighborhood. I've been keeping an eye on them. Like, no bullshit. Just in case. Just in case shit gets weird.

Well, if I was between vegetables and deer, you can't live that long on a small garden. Yeah. You can live for months on a deer. I can shoot one deer and I'll eat that fucker for three or four months. But if you have like four tomato plants and like some kale, you got some celery. Good luck. You got like three salads out of that shit.

Yeah. A lot of people came to me and asked to, it's like, how do you get one? What do I have to do? Like, they were asking people that like, or negative about guns before. I got a buddy mine. His wife's like, you're never getting a gun. We're never having a gun in the house. It's like, okay, fine. The lockdown happened to you because you got to get a gun immediately right away. He called me up laughing. He said, you told me I have to get a gun.

to change their mind. It's a relationship. It's real danger, you know, when shit was getting real weird. And this was before the riots and the looting. This was, this was just during the lockdown. People started getting nervous about food. When they started seeing people have fist fights over toilet paper. They're like, whoa, people are losing their shit.

Yeah, and you're going to be okay if you have a wash cloth and some water. You can wipe your ass. It's not that big a deal. You need food. That's what you need. I mean, you could clean a wash cloth. It's not that as long as you have water to have water and soap. Well, you're good. You don't really need toilet paper. You're going to be okay.

2020 without a doubt the weirdest year ever.

There's no, no time ever, we're there.

Yeah, I'm looking at the drama. I don't know. Keep everybody alive. What we need is a test that you can just, like a real quick saliva test.

Yeah. But just everybody walks in, lick that thing. Okay, you're good. Okay, you're good. Oh, you're not good. Like, no who's clean? Let everybody in. Yeah. I mean, if we did that, it would change everything. If they had some sort of a test, like a real easy saliva test. Just lick it and you know. We could wipe this shit out in a week.

It's easy now. Yeah, it used to be like that. These go deep in your nostrils, like way up into your sinus cavity. But now it's just the inside of your nose. It's nothing. No discomfort at all. It's like a little cute tip. It just goes inside the nose. They swap it around a little bit for like 10 seconds. They dip into some sort of a solution. They send it off and you'll know tomorrow. And then the antibody tests that you'll do. This is the FDA approved antibody test. They take a, you just squeeze your finger like that. They take, they put a little prick on the tip of your finger. A little blood comes out. They put it in a thing and you know in 10 minutes. Okay. It's easy. I'm sure you're fine. I'm looking at you right now. I feel good. Look, I'm good at this. Trust me. Let me see. You good. I think you good. If you've been right, do you write right? Do you like sit down, write your stand up? Or do you just like have ideas and work them out on stage?

You've been spending a lot of time alone. This is strange.

What is the obsession with becoming a game show host? That's you have in your special.

And I say, now, yeah. They come with a large chitter.

If I was in the same position I was when I took fear of actor, I'd take it again. Yeah. Because it changed my life. Change my life. Give me freedom, like real freedom. But it's a job. There's a big difference between doing that and doing stand up. When you do stand up, you're having fun. When you're doing fear factor, sometimes you're having fun. But it's a job. You're working. It was a great job. Don't give me wrong. Yeah.

What is it? Steve Harvey retires from Family Feud. That's an easy one. I would do Family Feud. I would do Family Feud. It's an easy one. No. It's an easy one. Survey says. Yeah.

And then they just, you know, we've got a Drew Carey's got prices right. That's an easy one. It looks easy.

Think about the Drew Carey thing. Drew Carey seems like he's a man. He's stacking money. He's stacking money, like, and no one even knows about it.

Right, but pat sageac's not a comic.

They didn't do anything. He was born on the set. He grew up there. He's been doing that forever. He's not a comic, though. Maybe he was at one point in time. Maybe? I don't think so, though. He's not a comic. If you ever heard a pat sageac do some former weatherman in talk show.

Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, so he hit the jackpot. But who else? What are the comics of done game shows? How we mendale? How we? He's done a gang of them right here that one dealer no deal. Hit more than one, right?

I was thinking of something else. Uh, dealer no deal was a winner. Like why did they ever stop that show?

Okay. Four people were bad.

That's what I've looked at steak. That's easy enough. Three. Can we get bored?

It's on YouTube. It's not a bad idea.

Was it said to Jesus Christ? How high did you get before you came here? No, this is me, man. CBD. It's the kill-cliff CBD. These are good, right? Very addictive. These are smooth. Good for you. Yeah. I'm addicted to these. That actually's not a bad idea for a show, as long as they didn't, like you could guess. And especially if it's like they said things that were like closely related to what they did, like maybe you can ask them what they did, like, uh, and then figure out who would say what?

I think they're filming things now because Felipe had a thing on his Instagram where he said he's he's on a new show. Or it might be a movie. And they're going to the set on Monday. And he's all excited. He was talking about the protocols and all the different shit they have to do for COVID, but they're fucking filming. But what I was saying is like, if you're filming, you have to go home at the end of the day. What if you go home and you go out and you catch it? And then you come back to the set. Like, how often are they testing you?

If someone gets it, like if you're the star, and you get it. What do they do? They locked the show down for two weeks and then come back.

Would you say that I think when I this was happening or starting Tyler Perry's production team was saying that they're gonna like lock the whole team down and quarantine together in like one hotel and then they all go to the set to nobody leaves right yeah everybody is tested nobody Tyler Perry can do that though because he's got his own right he's got his own studio he's his own boss he's got it locked up he doesn't have to deal with any bullshit he's all non union he's he's like he's got a complete system

Hmm. Yeah. We've got an iron pile of Paris kind of fucking iron. Yeah, that's the next level.

No. No. Not interested in my one.

No.

Yeah, but that was. That's true. But I got that because Elon talked me into it. He was willing to do my show. I said, all right, man, I'll buy a Tesla because he did my show. But then once I got it, I was like, he's right. It's dope. You have one? Dude. They're the craziest cars. Every other car seems dumb. It's so fast. It's so fast, it doesn't even make sense. Like it defies physics. It just goes together. It takes off. Like, and then you got this giant screen for the navigation, and then it drives itself. It does drive it itself, part. It's amazing. Everything's amazing about it. You can play video games on it. It got that fart thing, too. It's got the fart thing. If you hit the blinkers, you can do that.

Why wouldn't you just get a car?

Oh, okay.

So they have to touch it. Maybe they either wear a hazmat suit. I don't know how to do it. There it is. Oh, they drop it off on a strap and truck. Yeah.

I should have. Wow. They have 11,850 vehicles and they just drop it off on a flatbed and they don't even touch it.

Wow.

You seem like a dude who would like a fun car. You need something fun your life. Dodge Dart.

This still doing that Miami. I was in Miami and they had these like a like a Caprice classic on giant. I saw BMW 7 series on these giant fucking wheels. They look at the 27 inch wheels. I think that is the it's like a wagon. Like you driving around into old covered wagon.

Get a car that doesn't for you. Yeah, Lexus, there's a certain Lexus, the sedan, that you just press a button, a parallel park.

Think about when you first start doing stand-up. Probably weren't as good as you are now. You got to practice.

Just just go somewhere with his cars. He's parking parking. Parking. Parking.

Parking. Parking all day with a full tank of guys.

Yeah. I think some missed the crowd, but some love it because it's first of all, it's real quiet, no distractions. You don't have the energy people screaming at you. You can just focus on the fight. Um, and it's a lot like just being in a gym. Yeah. It's not like sparring. You know, so you could you could look at it that way. Um, I had like it as a comedy. I'm just like, I was just, uh, just talking to Louis about Louis C. K about this. I was like, I don't know if it's better. Like I kind of like it. I don't, I missed the crowd in some ways, but I kind of like no crowd because you could focus. Yeah, it's their different. They're very, they're different things. Like one of them is insane like if you go to a conema gregar fight and it's in a packed t-mobile arena and senato conners screaming singing and the fucking green mist is on the air and everything it's wild it's as a spectacle but there's something about the apex in it there, where it's just me and Daniel Corrie and John Anick and fucking Bruce Buffer screaming to nobody. There's nobody in the arena and then the fighters walk out. It's weird. And then when they're hitting each other man, you hear fucking everything. You hear every shot to the ribs you hear the You hear breathing heavy, you hear wind sing, you hear all that shit. You hear, you hear them talk shit to each other. It's very different. It's very different. The something stunning about someone getting really fucked up where there's no crowd noise, like Francis and Gano, who's the scariest person on the planet Earth, he knocked out Jazino Rosenstrike in like 20 seconds. And Rosenstrike is also a big scary dude. You know what Francis is? fuck he's terrifying and he always does connect on people, right? So he boom boom boom and Rosenstruck is out cold and there's no sound. There's just him walking off. Rosenstruck's out cold and we're sitting there going holy shit. This is why it's like there's no one there. There's no scream of the crowd. It's just The violence of it all, the explosion is so stunning. It's all, it's stunning. It's weird.

As long as you stay offline for a couple weeks.

It's a pitch move. It's a pitch move for sure, but it's a real common pitch move. It's super, it's 100% guaranteed. It's going to happen. If you get flatlined, someone's going to come along and go, BAH! They're going to have that thing from Friday with Chris Tucker. Yeah, they're going to have that. That's going to come up. Chris Tucker, nice cube. You're going to have people taunt you. Like some guys are fine with it. Like Ben Aschron who got knocked out by Jorge Mazvedal. Fascist knockout in history. It was just the one year anniversary of it a couple of days ago. And he was like, Oh, great. Like he was he was. Imagine your most embarrassing moment and they they celebrated it with a one year anniversary.

Yeah, but that wasn't to it was a packed audience and everybody went. Wow. And it lasted a long time, the screams and the cheers, and he was out for a long time, too. I don't know if that would be better if it was no one there. It would be stunning if there was, I think I'd like it better with no one there, man. I don't know, I love both of them, but I might like it, I hair better with no crowd.

Nah, I don't think so. Maybe they've been a little wilder. But I just think it's also like fighters didn't get the fight for months. So everybody was kind of chomping at the bit. And also, there's a lot of eyes on them. So everybody realized that this is the only game in town. There's no other sport. There's no other sports right now that are running except for the UFC.

And the Marvel races. And the floor is lava.

Shout out to Rutledge Wood. I don't know if any other sports are coming back anytime soon, okay? NBA is soon. Yeah. You know what I heard they're working on? They're working on a thing where there's going to be an app on your phone and you get to, you'll be able to make noise and that noise will be piped into the arena. So like each individual person, like you'll have a seat and your seat will be making noise.

I have to feel that people are going to organize shit, where they're going to chant and say things, you know, have fun, and they're like, you know, like, people will, they'll be things where people get together and try to figure out, like, maybe sing a song, like you have everybody together, all singing a song with the exact same time.

God basketball's back NBA playoff game. Imagine there's no heaven. Amazing. Never know. Well, listen, one of the things that's come out of this is a lot of people have gotten real creative with shit. You know, they've found ways to make things interesting. They've found ways to have fun. They've found ways to be, I'd like when people are confronted with real adversity and challenges because you get to see how the human imagination works. See creativity.

When you say gambling problem like what made it a problem.

And this is when you were drinking a lot too. This is what I was drinking and gambling and then getting up at midnight.

That's a game more it. Yeah, sort of. Great game. More of an investor.

Well, that's a wise way of looking at it, but a lot of people don't. When they get sucked into something, it's very hard to get, like, we were just talking about video games, about my addiction to video games. I just had a gold cold turkey. I just had a step away and go, I can't fucking do this anymore. And just, I figured it out and I stopped. That's not easy to do sometimes. Like sometimes, like whatever it is about gambling, like whatever switches that pops off in your brain that gives you that dopamine charge.

Jamie, you gamble a little, right? Yeah. Yep. You gamble on fights, too, right?

You don't. Right. Hang on. Hang on. Right. Right. Right. Right. Yeah.

I had a rumble. Yeah, I had a rumble for everybody except Kormier. Yeah. For whatever reason Kormier's got his number. But rumble hits anybody. They go night night. He's coming back. He's bored. So he's coming back. My comeback is heavyweight. Oh, wow. He's huge now. I mean, fucking huge, like 250 gigantic.

Whoa. And did you do like the demean more thing? We throw the money on the bed and roll around naked.

Just yeah, how big is a hundred thousand dollars and all hundred.

You said that?

My friend. Delete all that. My friend. I friend Dana White, the president of the UFC, he lost a million in a day. Yeah, a million. Well, it's point no blackjack. Yeah, plain blackjack. Million. Million dollars. He won seven million in a day. Seven. So he's doing crazy shit. Wow. Yeah, that's it. And he's very wealthy. So like the only way he's getting a charge is if he does some crazy shit. Yeah. That's that's madness. That's some, it's, it's, it's his. So hands sweaty. I get hands sweaty talking about that. Like, oh God, because I don't ever want to be that guy, but I could be that guy. Like if I got into gambling, I, I was gambling for a while in the UFC before I decided probably wasn't a good look. This is like the early, Early 2000s, but the early 2000s it was stealing money, right? Because there was a bunch of guys coming in like Anderson Silva. And I would look at the odds with Anderson Silva over Chris Lee, but I'm like, are you out of your fucking mind? This is a hundred percent fight, like bet the house on their Brazilian Jesus Christ. There was a few of those. And I did it for a while, and then I stopped, but my business partner and on it, he was gambled all the time. So I would just sit down with him before the fights. And so I was like, this way, my consciousness clear, but we were like 85, 87% like this. Dealing money because I know all these fighters. Yeah. I know the fights, like there's fights where a guy would be like slightly favored. I'm like slightly Like this is a hundred percent fight or this is a guy that was the underdog that might this is totally lopsided this is and still to this day sometimes they get wrong still to this day I look at someone like I'm like how is that guy the underdog doesn't make any sense and then the fight will be like a domination by the guy was the underdog I'm like okay, I should have bet that yeah, but I don't bet on them But my business partner at on it man. We made oh he made You know, I made it for him, but we called a lot. I mean, literally, high 80%. It was just stealing money. Damn. Yeah. Yeah. That's barely gambling. That's kind of gambling, but that's like, I mean, let's get's gambling fights are crazy. Anything can happen, but some shit you know.

Did I ever fuck you over? Did any of them ever turn bad?

They all can't lose, and they can't believe it. They just want to jump out of a fucking building. That's why when you go to Vegas, all the windows and the casinos, they don't open wide up. They don't want you to just jump off, because there would be people jumping off every couple of days. Yeah, man. Do you think all the 100, when Vegas was wide open, all the hundreds of thousands of millions of people coming in there and how many of them are just blowing in same chunks of cash? They don't pay for those places on the buffet. You know, that's not what pays for those big buildings. It's people, people losing, losing.

You can't count cards. You can't be good at what you're doing.

They people get beat up. They kick Dana out of the pumps for winning. Yeah. And, you know, so he pulled the UFC from the pumps. It's like fuck you.

Yeah, they used to have the fights there. And then they kicked them out of there. They see, you can't gamble him. What? Like, you're, you're fine if I lost, but as soon as you win, they'll just put the cabosh on you. Yeah, they had to take that.

Yeah, there's a lot of businesses needed money constantly coming in. They can't just exist. Like the way they're set up, they need that. And no one ever thought it was going to be something that shot everything down or no money was coming in from months and months. That's never happened. Like you can't make a business model based on something that's never happened before. So everybody thought the money was going to keep flowing in.

Why are you holding on to a tour?

I do four, right? I do four now. Yeah. I did two before and I did it in Denver. The first show some lady heckled. Oh my god, that bit's dead. Now I'm fucked. Now I have to get it right in a second show. It was a lot of pressure.

Yeah. It was a big bit. It's big bit. Yeah. It was a bit that led up to another bit too. There's a lot to it. They, they, they pile on together. Yeah. and the way she did it, it was like, oh, come on, prove it. It was like, it wasn't even a good heckle. Yeah. It was like, it's just a challenge. Give me some time, dummy. I know what I'm doing here. Yeah. But then I did four and when I did four, I did four for triggered and I did it out of pocket. Like Netflix had a certain amount of budgeted out, but I said, I want to do four. And the idea was that if I did four, When I went on stage for the first one, I was like, it was a regular show. I had no nerves. I didn't have feel like, oh my god, I got to get this right. If I get this right, my second show will be loose. I didn't feel that at all. I just went out with, it was just totally normal.

I don't remember on triggered. I think it was probably the second night, but on strange times my last one, a lot of it was the first show, because that was just so pumped up right out of the gate. It was so excited. And I was ready. I've done specials before. I didn't plan enough. But now I want to do a special. I treat it like like I'm training. Like I want to be like I'm running a marathon. Like I put those miles in. So when I get onto that stage, the night of the show, everything's oiled up. Greased and smooth and just every words in place and the experience of doing stand-up is so deeply ingrained in me It's just a nightly thing every night two three shows bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang and so when I'm done like I want Saturday night last show like I am fucking done with this material. I don't even want to hear these jokes anymore. I did it. I'm done.

I think it's a good move to put things on YouTube. I mean, it worked out real great for Andrew Schultz. Mark Norman worked out real great for him. He loves it. Yeah. He's got like more than 2 million views. Like a couple of weeks.

And you give it to yourself. Yeah, you can edit it all yourself. You need anybody. Yeah, I think that's going to be a lot of comics going to look to that is in terms of accessibility right now Netflix has the market cornered. But Amazon is sneaking in, Gaffigan had a real good experience at Amazon. And he said that they got really excited about it. They had a lot of views. They were very excited. It was the most viewed hour they had in a long period of time. So he said they're going to do more. The thing about doing something on YouTube is everyone can see it. Oh, where? And you see it on your phone. Instant. Like that. Anytime you want, you're on a bus, you're on a train, you're driving in your car, you can listen to it instantly. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. I'll share the other link. Yeah. And you share a link and you never have to worry about if you have the app. Everybody has fucking YouTube. And even if you don't have it, your browser opens up and you get it. Yeah.

You're drunk. And this guy is arresting you for going back into a bar.

And you have extreme responsibility. You have a gun on your hip in front of everybody. like it's not like whether or not I don't know you have a gun you might have a gun do you definitely have a gun it's right there and you're allowed to shoot people you're allowed to it's part of your job and train to shoot people it's part of your job you have to be elevated you have to be above normal discourse you have to be able to handle all kinds of shit and the reality is that's not the case with most people that are police officers

Doesn't mushrooms let you know if you fucked up, too. Oh, man. They will let you know. They'll drag you. They would drag you to the darkest part of your imagination.

That's where they say silent dark. This is the way to go. Saddest, Saddy, is the movie party. Hi, I'm mushrooms thinking you killed everybody.

Oh man, I don't envy cops. I would not want that job. It is a very hard job. But I, you know, I'm an optimistic person, generally, but I don't know what's going to come out on the other end of all this shit. This is getting in those kill clips on legit. I don't know what's going to come out on the other end of this.

I forgot about that. For people who don't know, Hannibal and I did a podcast where we got hammered and then I had a podcast afterwards with Sam Harris and I think it was Josh Zeps. Yeah. Who's an Australian TV presenter now. And you guys got into it about he was pulling up stats on police brutality or violence with cops and I was like faded.

Well, it's the touchiest subject in all of history, cops killing people. That's the touchiest subject you can kill by the people that are supposed to protect you, especially unjustly. You know, I mean, nothing else would have made that, these protests the way they went down like that George Floyd video to see it so obvious. where there's no ifans or butts that is what it is. It is a cop who's supposed to protect someone. He's killing somebody in front of everybody and it's being filmed by a 17-year-old girl. It doesn't get any heavier. Doesn't get any heavier. And that's why the reaction was the way it is. It was like a powder keg. It's like everything was building up. There had always been that. There had always been this insane tension. And then you see that. And it's just like, and we're still dealing with it.

Oh my god.

Yeah. Yeah, but it's, I mean, how often do you offer social media like that? Is that a normal thing for you? It was

The longest running joke ever.

I get it. So you did the interview, and then you found out afterwards. Did you want to call them back? I go here.

I talked that Jaco Willink, he's a former Navy SEAL commander, and he said that they should be training 20% of their time. So that they train for a very short amount of time in the beginning of their career, and then they'll train anymore. is that they should be training 20% of their time on the force. Why are they there? They should be going over how to diffuse situations. They should be going over how to keep people safe. What's your objective? What are you trying to do when you come up to a drive? If you're emotional, if you're a partner's emotional, you got to see that and step in. You diffuse that situation and you step in and go, hey Mike, let me talk to this guy. And then you come in and you be a nice guy. Figure out a way. If you see someone abusing someone, you got to step in, step in, relieve him, and you take over and figure out a way to do it where the guy doesn't have to lose face, but you can keep everybody safe and figure out a way where they can train these people. It's where it's shit like this doesn't happen. And it's, we're in this time where these, these fucking people, they go to work every day, one end of they're gonna die. They go to work every day, pulling people over, they're all freaked out. You never know what day's gonna be your last. If you're a cop, you're seeing people get shot every fucking day. I mean, I can't imagine. I mean, to look at it from their perspective to be, to look at it with the rosiest of rose colored glasses, I can't imagine that you are you're walking up on suicide victims, murder victims, you're walking up on robbery victims, you're constantly around violence and death and crime. They're all PTSD now. That's what I think. I think most cops have extreme PTSD. And some of them can handle it. Some of them can just handle it. And there's a lot of them that are good people. And then there's a lot of them that should never end fucking cops in the first place. They should have been a more stringent process. That guy in the George Floyd case, You know, they got into it when they worked together because the cops was abusive. It was abusive to customers and George Floyd and him got into it because of that. So there was a personal element to it. I don't want that job. You don't want that job. I mean, fuck that job. But the people that get that job and we've got to figure out a way to make it safer for them, better for them, better training and safer for everybody else. And I don't know what the fucking solution is. No one does. That's why we're all in chaos. And the people running around, defund the police, like, whoa, okay, do you know what, but that's like, that's like New York City right now, where people getting shot left and right, did you see like the stats in New York City? It's crazy. It's fucking crazy. It was on the cover of the cover of the New York Post. See, we can find that about the amount of shootings. 41 people shot over the weekend, nine killed, something crazy like that. Well, they said they've never had it like this. This is like, since the 80s is the worst gun violence weekend they've had in the history of the police force.

The mayor wants the cops to stand down, cops are quitting left and right. The cops don't feel like they're supported by the mayor. The mayor is like the super progressive, you know, really liberal guy who is just has no respect. The police officers have no respect for them. And they're quitting. They don't want to do this. And then you've got people that don't think that they're in a place that's being policed. And so they're just going wild. They don't think the cops are coming. They don't think anybody's going to stop them. So then, you know, obviously with the COVID and the lockdown, how many people are out of work? How many people are broke? How many people are just on tilt just starving and not knowing where their fucking money is coming from and super tense? Damn, man. So you can't defund the police. We don't want to live in Mad Max. We don't want to live in Mad Max. We want more funding for the police. Better education for the police. And we all got to come to some sort of a fucking agreement. Cops are us.

Mushrooms. Mushrooms for all cops.

Mandatory mushroom training. Yeah.

Everybody, including politicians, mandatory mushrooms for politicians, I want to be in the room with like the governor knew some California. I want to be in the room when that guy eats five grams. Yeah. I want to see how he freaks out. Yeah. How do you handle it? We should all be able to watch you eat five grams. I want to know who you are when the devil comes knocking at your door.

Did you find the cover?

Well, just the numbers though. What is that?

Okay, I was wrong. I thought it was 40. Hey, 101 people shot over a weekend. That's crazy. That's crazy. That is fucking crazy. I mean, for New York though, New York City's going to skyrocket. It's our closures let pistol purps walk free.

Chaos. A thousand people have been indicted with a gun possession charge where the cases are open and they're walking around the streets in New York City today.

That's just in New York City. Oh my god, that's madness. 2,000 shooters. Running around New York. Just think of that. You can't defund the police folks. All that crazy progressive Marxist nonsense of defunding the police. Stop. You want to be safe. You want everybody to be safe. You just want the police to be way better at what they're doing. Way better. And they're going to need funding for that. It seems counterintuitive, right? Like if cops are abusive, they shouldn't get money. But that's not going to the cops. It needs to go to education and they need to figure out how to do it better. What am I a cop educator? Fuck my talking about. You coming to me for cop advice? You fucked up. I'm a pothead and a cage fighting commentator. You coming to me for cop advice?

Get out of here by November. No matter who wins in November, it's gonna be madness.

And then the politicians are playing off it both ways. You have some politicians that are playing off it. They're supporting that. And then some politicians like Trump, he's upset that the Washington Redskins and the Cleveland Indians are going to change their name now.

It looks like they're breaking. They're talking about breaking. But what are they going to call themselves? Like what's offensive?

with the washed in spray tanks. Yeah. We're not the wedskins. What are they going to call them? So do we know?

Do you know how valuable those red skin's jerseys are going to be?

I know, but the old red skin's jerseys are going to be so valuable.

Really? Yeah.

What I just thought was crazy was NASCAR just removed the Confederate flag. They just did it just recently Last week because of Rick goes the bubble walls thing just recently removed the kit like I didn't think it was still there Yeah, that is I hey everybody's looking let us do this real quick everybody's let's get us to get this up out of here.

Yeah, it's interesting, man. So it's weird where this is all going to end, because it's going to be an adjustment, right? There's an over-correction, and then there's an adjustment, things come forward and back, and, you know, we want to get to a place where people are just cool with each other. And we're not there.

Do they have stand up in Ghana if you checked on that?

Did you really?

And so you went and did your stand up and did they not understand you?

Oh, so they preferred you to perform in Pigeon, and when you were just doing it in regular English, they didn't, it didn't work with them.

And it's like one of those places where people don't pay attention to lights.

Cars are parked sideways. On the highway.

It's intense. Look at that.

That is fucking insane. These images, Jamie, what do you, what do you Google in? So people can Google along with you.

This is just folks. This isn't insane. There's people standing in the middle of the highway with umbrellas and not, not a few people. A lot of people.

It's, uh, oh my god. This is crazy. Oh my god. It's everywhere.

This video is what is this video title?

And this is all water. So these houses are in water. Just barely above the water on sticks. This is fucking crazy. No, everything's on fire. Look at that. Oh my god, this is madness. That is, but it's amazing that so many people live there. And then, you know, this is just what they accept. People just get used to a certain way of living. And for them, I mean, it's probably normal life. For you or for us, we go there and like, what the fuck?

What's a food like there?

Yeah, they're doing a lot in the Congo as well. There's a lot of mineral rights and stuff. They're taking there. A lot of precious elements and stuff. Things that they use for cell phones and all kinds of stuff like that. I've never been to any place like that, but I've been to Mexico City, and I was stunned by the air quality there, too. Mexico City's madness, man. I took photos of it, and I put it up on my Instagram. It looks like I'm flying into a fire. See if we could find that. Like, as I was flying in, I was like, this does not even look real. It looks like you can barely see the buildings, because it's just, that's it. Look at that. That's not a fire. That's my phone out the window. Crazy. Wait.

Oh, yeah. All that smoke in the background. Yeah. That's all just emissions. That's not a fire. Like you can see like a mile or two out and that's it. Everything else is just clouds. But it's just it's just exhausts.

Look at that image from Brandkark. Yeah. God damn that's crazy. That's like you're in the middle of a raging forest fire, like you can't

When I was in Mexico City, I got a headache. I was like, I'm getting a headache just from the air. And plus it's that altitude. Mexico's pretty high up there. And that was for the UFC fights, which was really crazy because they're like 8,000 feet above sea level. So there's thin air and then bad air. It's a combination of both things.

Yeah, well some of them like Fabrice overdume that was when he beat came Velasquez, he went up into the mountains and he trained actually higher than 8,000 feet above sea level and he went up their way in advance so he can acclimate and he was in superb shape because that and then Kane who's usually known for his cardio actually gasped out.

He couldn't go there early. He came out like two weeks out and that's not enough. They say you're actually better off going there the day of than going there two weeks of. Be it two weeks before because two weeks before you're actually, you're not going to acclimate. You're actually just going to be tired. You know, because your body's still trying to figure out what the fuck is going on. Why is there no air? We're lucky, man. Oh. We're lucky. And there's a China is even worse in some cities, man. There was one city that I saw in China where there was so much pollution in this video that it looked like the sky, like it was nighttime, and it was during the day. And it was just coal, just burning coal in the air, just particulates. The air was like a dark gray. It was crazy. Let's see if we find that. It's weird to look at because you imagine like if that was your mom living there or your daughter or your family. This is where you have to survive and you have to look up into that sky every day. It's like a judge dread movie, you know? It's doom.

Do you have asthma? Yeah, I have asthma. Oh, wow. Yeah. But I would don't fucking suck.

Have you found any shit from

Oh, I got distracted. We could wrap this up. We're almost at six o'clock. And that's when we find out.

You travel on YouTube. Um, next time when you come back from Ghana, I need to know. You know what that was like. Talk. Yeah, man. I'm back and I'm right a book. Whoo. Have you ever thought about writing a book for this?

I have a lot of respect for people who've done it because that's a thing. If you're an author, you've really done it. You really wrote a book.

My friends have done it though, like Tom Poppo or Norton or Whitney. They say it's fucking brutally hard. It's a lot of work. It's a extreme amount of effort.

I had a book deal once. The editor was so annoying. talking to them. They essentially wanted me to take my stand up at one point in time, just transcribe it. And I was like, I'm not doing that. And they're idea of what it wanted to be or what they wanted it to be versus my idea. I just gave them the money back. I'm like, I'm not doing it. That was like more than 10 years ago. Yeah, that was before the podcast even.

Something crazy like that.

I'm still down for that. All right. Let's do it when things get normal.

Back from Ghana. Back next fall. The King of Ghana tour. All right.

Well, thank you, sir. Always a pleasure. Thank you, Matt. And your YouTube special is available right now. And you can check it out. Yeah. And the King of Ghana will be released in December of 2021. Good night, everybody. Stay tuned for who said that? Who said that? This episode is brought to you by Dr. Squatch. I'm going to let you in on a secret. If you want to be more confident, you have to start taking care of yourself. And a great way to do that is use Dr. Squatch, especially with their new private hygiene products. They were designed to help you look and feel fresh all over. Like the groin, guardian trimmer. It's perfect for grooming above and below the waist and the ball barrier dry lotion helps manage sweat and chafing while beast wipes keep you clean front to back. It's the care your body deserves. Try them today. Whether you're new to Dr. Squatch or you use it every day, get 15% off your order by going to Dr. Squatch.com slash JRE15 or use the code JRE15 at checkout.