Transcript for #185 - Tom Segura

Tell me when we're up. We're up.

Yeah, and I don't want to stop the subject record because when, you know, when that happened when I when the 90s, you know when they started fucking shooting each other and coming out with gangster rap. They're never been anything like that. Could you imagine like the beach boys, you know, and they fucking hated Elvis, they want to shoot them. Fuck you, man. Yeah. She took off bitches and there was the first time where guys were ever able to brag about everything about their money, about their sexual conquest. It's like they'd never been, you know, like Eddie Bravo was talking about that song, you know, she swallowed it. It's not a good song. I mean, I don't like it. It's okay.

Yes, MC Ran. MC Ran was amazing. What happened to that customer? I have no idea.

Yeah. Oh, Tommy with the fucking Zare. Who's gonna play AIDS? Oh shit. No, you didn't.

Yeah. What was Jericho juice? Was it just oil?

There's a fighter who is a black guy from some some K1 guy, but he carve like designs like tribe designs in his hair. It looks bad. Yeah, it looks bad.

But do you think a black eye can get away with wearing like a white guy's hair like a black girl does? No. No. No, that's too hilarious. Black dudes, if that was the next thing, they all started having Banjo we hair. Yeah, no. They just all had Banjo we hair weaves.

Yeah, this is a thousand dollars. Is it strange though, but becomes popular and non-popular? You know, like a girl's are allowed to have everything can be fake. You can have fake tits. Yeah, fake hair. Nobody uses shit as long as you look good. You look good. Good. Okay. Let's go. You know, no guy is like really not mean guys are don't get me wrong, but it's acceptable for you to be pretty enough.

Isn't it what did you imagine though if you found out a dude was wearing blue contacts?

Oh, that's right. It's not like the end of the movie. Looks like it's got the camera's thriller.

What a great music video. That was.

That was like a world news.

That was so cool. I think that's true. Like seeing that. Yeah. And put for me, it was a werewolf. So I was even more excited.

And a cool one. A really, that was Rick Baker that did that I believe. I believe it was the same guy to the monitor werewolf in London. He did a lot of the Star Wars shit that coordinated dancing. All the dancing was cool. What is that? What was the message behind that? You know, a little weird fucking video in moving. I remember people were saying it was Titanic. I remember that. There was a bunch of protests about it. Oh, yeah. We were upset. What a fucking fascinating guy.

Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston, probably the two most talented people that died in everybody's thought coming. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? We talked about like really uniquely talented people that everybody's like man, you know, how long is this gonna last? Yeah. How long can you? Do you remember that the the Bobby Brown show being Bobby Brown? Yeah. When they were on the show screaming yelling each other.

That's a complete shit out of my ass. Yeah.

Do you remember what they interviewed her? There was an interview where the guy was trying to get to what the fuck was up. And he's like, is it cocaine? Is it alcohol? And she's like, at times, at times. at times all of them, like at times all of them. And he's like, you know, if you ever smoke crack, and she was like crack is whack. Yeah. She said crack is whack.

Yeah. And he also said it's rumored that you spent $750,000 one year on drugs. And she said,

It was the strangest interview man to listen to a person who, you know, when you grew up, you know, the bodyguard, and remember her with Kevin Costa, she was such a talent.

No, it's got dude Yeah her seat. I don't know if you can play that I would think we could play that and try it for now at all probably Not like give it like a little sample of it or something. I don't know.

It's really stunning to listen to it. It's just look up how will I know Whitney Houston isolated lyrics love it used to hands a freak tight with one hand and at the fuck you don't have it She's taking forever. He's a bunch of chickens scratch on that screen This episode is brought to you by Robin Hood. You want financial security for you and your family? Well, you gotta make it happen. The world doesn't owe you a living and that's how I've always approached my finances and you can too with Robin Hood. Robin Hood pioneered commission-free stock trading over a decade ago, and they continued to offer innovative products to help you maximize your money's potential. With over 23 million funded customers, Robin Hood is helping people build a better financial future. Robin Hood gives you complete autonomy to make investments to pursue your future goals, whatever they are. Maybe you want to look towards investing for your family's future, investing for retirement, or even a vacation to the Bahamas. We all have some bucket list items to cross off and Robinhood has tools to help you pursue them. Investing a small amount now could make a big difference 30 years down the road. Take control of your financial future with Robinhood. Download the app or visit Robinhood.com to learn more. Disclosure, investing involves risk and loss of principle is possible. Returns are not guaranteed. Other fees may apply. Robin Hood Financial LLC, member SIPC, is a registered broker dealer. This episode is brought to you by Zippercrooter. Look, patience is good at all. But if you're just sitting around waiting for everything good to come your way, well, you're going to be disappointed. And you're going to miss out on some amazing opportunities like your dream vacation. You have to work, save that money and actually plan it out. It's never going to happen if you just sit on your couch at home thinking about it. And the same applies to your company. You don't want to miss out on hiring the best people for your team. And luckily, there's an easy solution that you can use. It's Zippercouter. Try it for free right now at zippercouter.com slash rogan. They'll find you qualified people for your role quickly. And once you find someone you like, Zippercouter can help put you at the front of the pack. Just use their pre-written invite to apply message to connect with your favorite candidates ASAP. So, let ZipperCruiter give you the hiring hustle that you need. See why, four out of five employers who post on ZipperCruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. Just go to zippercruiter.com slash rogan to try it for free. Again, that ZipperCruiter.com slash rogan. ZipperCruiter. The smartest way to hire. Brian's gonna confuse the fuck out of people. There's a way to take that video of your eustream and put it on mine.

People are mad at you, Brian. This is another old Brian moment. People like it when you fuck up. Do you notice that?

They love it.

Yeah, people like a little conflict. This is a dude who just sent me 19, tell Brian to shut the fuck up and a row. Okay, that guy's blocked.

It's a strange thing to listen to, man, because you know there's not, you can give me a million years of all the coaches in the world. They listen to that. Yeah, listen to this shit.

Can't seem to get enough. Yeah, damn she was good. Yeah. She was fuck. That's just a, that's a once in a lifetime voice man. That is just a perfect voice. Yeah. She had the perfect voice.

It's fucked. That was the first time ever. There was a hot girl that a hot man was falling in love with. Yeah. You know, that she's black. And they did a major movie about it. Have they ever done that before? Well, the hot black girl and the man get together. If, uh, man, nobody barely even complained. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Who cares? Yeah. Just fucking roll the camera. Say whatever you want. Yeah. We'll tie it all together. You're working with Kevin Costa. He'll carry along. She can act too. Acting is easiest, fuck man. Acting is shit. I mean, there's this high level acting, obviously that none of us can do. But the regular acting like the bodyguard. Yeah, you could do that. Yeah, you could do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do Hardball together. It was a stupid baseball show that yeah, it's a technical show, but it was a I made a bunch of good friends Mike Star was one of them. He got beat up in a bunch of movies. You got beat up in a Steven Seagall movie. Ha ha ha. I got real mad at Steven Seagall because Steven Seagall was hitting him really hard.

Yeah. Yeah, he had a wound up out and actually having to put like a chest protector on because the guy was not really supposed to hit him. You know, it was supposed to like fake hit him. It's for fucking moving. You know, you're seeing Steven Seagall which is the lightest chest. Why I'm hit him with that fucking Wing Chun punch and that he can't say shit to Steve really. He just does it man. He's known for doing that, you know? What is, you know, he's trying to make a fucking badass movie. Right. And unfortunately when you're trying to make a badass movie, sometimes you've got to sacrifice. Yeah. I'm gonna kick you in the chest right now man. Get a fucking stomp dudes on occasion. That's what he, I mean, that was his attitude. Hell. I don't know.

That's what time it is. What happened? What happened? Like the guy that it was in the movie that always has like the witty one liner after you kicked in the ball.

The Clint Eastwood, every which way, but loose movies were the first time that they really combined like action and comedy together with a dude who wasn't a comedy guy, but it worked. It works, man. It works. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. That worked. Fucking cleanly dude, come on man, every which way but loose was awesome and that was back when cleanies would was stuck with that one chick wasn't him Sandra Lock. I remember he did a million movies with this freak. Yeah, I guess you know that was just his girl and they did a bunch of movies together, but as soon as they broke up man shit god Ugly really yeah, he got her like some development deal get her to fuck away for a moment, you know, and she accused him of blocking everyone of her projects. No, he wanted to do anything there. I was in trouble. She was shooting a shit out of him. It was just gross man. It was just when when people like divorce and they do it publicly like that, you like lose so much respect for the more vocal member of the two. You know, that was one of the case with the thing with her. I automatically assumed, well, this bitch is crazy. Well, there you go. Yeah, yeah. And she never really worked again. You know, Sandra Lock disappeared. She was in a ton of movies with Clint Eastwood. But that was about it after that, you know, she thought it was because he blackballed her. But most people, I think a lot of us probably, people thought she was gross. Like, you know, yeah, what's going, what are you doing to Clint? Yeah, everybody.

He can't fuck over. That's movie royalty. Good. The bad and the ugly. Come on. You leave him alone. You know what you do? I can't imagine the stories that he had. Yeah. Oh my god.

No, I know what you're talking about. Yeah.

Right. Yeah. People are super sensitive. You're not even supposed to joke around them. Yes. Unless you are of a nationality of a minor or rather a sort of metaphor. Not minor.

I think a minority and I'll just stop at minor. That's the entire name. I think that for a lot of people that give minorities like you, you know, whether you're black people can make fun of white people all day long. But you're walking a fine line and make fun of black people. Yeah. I've seen you do some great black jokes and I see people go oh shit. Right. Like I see people like the clench them go oh shit. Yeah. Because people worry, people worry when a white guy makes fun of black people. It gets to be a real, but black people can make fun of white people. I've seen white people laugh at the shet.

This weird, they do that fake white guy in voice. It's like a rip off of the Richard prior white guy voice. Richard prior was like, it was a really unique thing we'd say. You know, you can't fuck a white people. You're like, hey man, you mama. My mom's a great old gal. You know, and he developed that sort of white guy voice and everybody sort of stole it. He stole it. And a lot of people that are terrible. Yeah, it's kind of like, come on man. White guys don't talk like that. That's not how they talk. Yeah, I think a lot of them give a horrible example. Yeah, you're like, that's not it's silly.

Yeah, it's weird. It's a weird gimmie, you know, so for a lot of black guys, like especially when they're first starting out and stand up, that's the first thing they go to. Yeah. And isn't that one of those things that you see and you go, oh, he's going there. Yeah, yeah. Oh, of course.

Like there's that's to be like a super good example for you.

Do you think this is going to ever going to be a point where all just gray, like a moko. I turn that gross.

You think so? Oh, definitely. Why are people attracted to blonde girls then? But we talked about this. You know what? What I'm not attracted to is blonde eyelashes and blonde eyebrows. I'm not attracted to blonde girls. I'm attracted to blonde girls that do shit with their eyelashes and their eyebrows. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

And he's not funny though. That's a weird or girls who don't do that. Like girls who have naturally brown eyebrows. Yeah. And that's where they use it. I gravitate a lot of them don't. Really?

You know what's really freaking me out, man? I'm out of people that are putting shit in their face. I'm out of people that are putting like fillers in their face.

It's becoming, well, it's not even cheeky implants. That's what I thought they were, too. I thought though, like remember when Mickey worked at that Mickey work, lost his fucking marbles. Remember that? Yeah. It's like in the 90s, I guess. He has his skin plants. Did he get implants? Yes, he did. Yes, he did. He got a face and then he got a removed. Now, yeah, check implants and he looked bizarre. Yeah. Well, I think what happened was that's when he was boxing and when he had a pretty intense like segment of his life where he just boxed and he boxed professionally, he got his fucking brains rattle dude. He looks like it too. Yeah, and I think that changed him as a person. Yeah, I think it made him, you know, this wacky eccentric. Like, remember Gary Bucy, who's a regular dude, crashes his motorcycle, becomes his wacky, emotionally crazy. Yeah, he used to be this really brilliant actor, really talented actor, like, Mr. Joshua. Remember that? Yeah. And, uh, fucking, uh, what was that movie? He's exciting guy. What movie was that? Uh, we burned himself. Yeah, I forget. Bruce Willis movie? I know he was that bulb fiction.

It's my point was.

Yeah, it was. Yeah, it was Leath the weapon. Hold on. Remember seeing point, break? Yeah, I think so. That was a good fucking moment. It was a great moment. Yeah, Gary Boose, he was the lead of the weapon. Yeah, that's what it was. But what was I saying? He was a regular dude and head trauma transformed them. Yeah. And I think that's also what happened to Mickey Rork. You know, he's a regular dude and he got so crazy that he would decide to do a good idea to put plastic things inside his cheeks to make his cheeks better. And like nobody would know. Have you ever seen the fact that the photos? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He had him removed and now he's just got this court weird thing.

I think a lot of those dudes are just Botox in it Botox and if they still freeze their face like they can't move like like if you get mad at something you can't move your forehead just way better to be able to do that and look old It's so silly. It's just you don't look better. You just look weird. You look weird. Your face doesn't move. Why isn't your face moving? These girls on these Beverly Hills housewives shows. There's a lot of these women have like fillers in their face. And then on top of that, they have Botox. So they have these shiny faces that are like puffed up and they don't move. And they look like masks. Yeah. I was high as fuck once. That was in the green room with Joey Diaz. Joey turns on the TV and it was Joan Rivers and I just freaked out. Yeah, I just freaked out because I was like so baked and it hit me like I looked at it and like really hit me what she's done and you know, you're just going to go just tell her to stop just tell her stop doing that. Yeah, she's telling her and she doesn't do it. It doesn't make you look better. It doesn't make you look better. It's a crazy. I know. It's the weirdest thing ever that frozen puffy face. You know, it's like they're injecting things into their face because when you get older the first one first things it happens is your face starts to lose body fat. That's why you get like sort of sunk in and wrinkly your lose so they they're injecting things in there and puff it up and well, it's crazy looking man. She looks wild then. It's a monster face. It's a monster face. That's why when I see these women I call the monster faces because you see them all the time and it's like it really is a just a mistake. You know, it's a mistake of you shouldn't do it.

Well, it's also you convince yourself that you could fix something like I got hair transplants and I totally wish I'd never done it because I have this stupid scar in the back of my head now There was I would shave my head, but I got it because I was convinced that I could fix something like my hair was falling out. I was like, how do I fix this? Yeah, it's your way to fix this. You research ways to fix this. You talk to the doctor. I can fix it and they can fix it. Okay, I'll just get it fixed. It doesn't fix. It fixes it temporarily, but all the other hair falls out of it. The way I described it, I said it's like you're taking a bunch of healthy people and you're moving them to a neighborhood where everyone's dying. So they take care from the back of your head. They move it to the top of your head and then all of its neighbors just fucking wilt.

Yeah, yeah, they can yeah. Yeah, I'm actually having treatments. They shoot things in your scar makes it smaller. Oh, cool. Court of Zone or something. Yeah, the fuck it is. Something, but it, um, it's Botoxic. It's not, it's not like a bad. Like I've seen guys who have bad ones. Mine's really thin. It's a very thin scar, but it's long. I've seen dudes who have big fat wide ones.

Yeah. Do you think that should have like a lot of bling to his track? I mean, there should have a giant Jesus on the cross. It'd be a conversation piece. It'd be nice, but we're made of diamonds and no one will even know. There we go. What's going on with your head? Nothing, whatever.

3D. Maybe an eagle on the back of my head, bro. American badass. Now you're thinking, like, like, it's claws. We'll have, like, the American flag in it. Yeah.

Yeah, I find it totally weird.

I think we think of that because of Dracula, right? But it is that what they really wore. I think it was cool as fuck back then and they hadn't really figured out jackets. Yeah.

Giant thing that they would throw over them like a blanket that you run out of the house with.

Yeah, that's a sad mouth. How was this guy in the 30s? I would say five, four. Wow. Oh my goodness. I just wanted to, yeah, a cape is better than that. Yeah. The tape is a more powerful statement. Definitely. The host of fear factor in Mexico had a cape. Real? Yeah. Yeah. When we were doing fear factor, they spun off a bunch of other fear factors. Yeah. And one of them they did in Mexico. I don't even know if they fucking, it was like official. This one really I just ganked it. Yeah, but they would copy our ideas and they would do him was like no safety at all Like we had one where we had these people where they had to get They had a rescue dummy out of a burning building and we put them in its crazy fire suits with a helmet on and we had Dude standing by with fire extinguishers when they did it on the Mexican show they wore shorts Wow. They were just people in shorts. Yeah. I went through a fucking house that was burning. That's right. Yeah, I was ridiculous. It was probably a regular house, too. I was just a fake house that the fire department uses for training in these things. It doesn't burn down. This is covering motor.

We want to be able to do things safe. We want to be able to sue people that don't look out for our safety. But ultimately, somewhere along the line, we're becoming a bunch of pussies.

I mean, there's people that have legitimate concerns and legitimate claims.

Well, you know about the way they spilled the McDonald's coffee on them. That's super ridiculous. Yeah. I think they overturned that. I think that's the overturned that. Yeah.

If you heard about the Monsanto lawsuits, they're guilty of chemically poisoning people in France. They chemically poison the French farmer. Wow. Yeah, that's going to be a big suit. Yeah. Yeah, they've found guilty. Really. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know the exact story. Apparently it's the first such claim to ever reach French court and Monsanto apparently they have some fucking pesticides. There's another thing they found out that in 93% of pregnant women that they tested, they found this pesticide that exists in Monsanto genetically modified crops. Uh-huh. Yeah, uh-huh. Yeah, man, you know. Our politicians sold us down a river. They let all this shit go on because this is a giant company that makes a ton of money. And the way they make the ton of money is they patent plants. They genetically engineer them so that it's uniquely theirs. And then they decide where they sell it. They decide what price they have for it. And you can't do anything about it. And you have to buy new stuff every year. And by if it cross pollinates with the neighbor, they can sue the neighbor for copyright infringement. It's completely crazy. They figured out a way to copyright life. And they've actually tried to do it with pig parts and monsanto's crazy. I mean, they've tried to do it with a bunch of different shit. But this should have never been able to get to this position. This is the best evidence that the United States needs, the best evidence. Something like monsanto, the best evidence that our political system is completely corrupt. Because if you were really looking out for people, there's no fucking way you would let a company make a bunch of shit take plants, patting them, then soup people because the air carries their pollen, they cross pollen, they neighbors plants, and then this neighbor just, you know where the fuck he got that shit from, you ask holes. You know, you're going to get to sue them, and you're going to take it, got to court, and there's India in India there's a whole bang fucking giant group of farmers that have been killing themselves because they they get indebted to Monsanto and they can't afford to pay their bills there.

Yeah, well, this is crazy because you got to think about how much political poll that they have and the fact that they still lost in court. Yeah, that that says a lot. Yeah. You know, I think people are rising up and they're getting tired of this bullshit. It's ridiculous what these people have allowed to take place and it doesn't have to continue along the same lines. You know, what we really need is healthy food. What we don't need is a bunch of fucking crazy shit where companies come along and genetically modified crops, and then they take those crops, and then they sell them to people with no evidence whatsoever about the long-term implications of this exposure to some of these chemicals. And what is this going to do to the environment? You're playing with God, man. You're doing really crazy shit when you start altering life, and then entering that. I mean, this isn't as simple as you know, packaging a new kind of soap. You're doing something pretty fucking crazy. Yeah, the people are gonna be in their system. There's not that much, yeah, there's not that much evidence, like it's like, or not that much, for history of genetically modified foods. I mean, we need like 10, 20, 30 years to really analyze what the fuck it does, the environment, people, and what's the chain reaction, you know, what is the wings of the butterfly do from the modified food to the, you know, the positive effect, the ecosystem that it all said, and it takes over. Yeah, you know, it's weird, man. It's weird when you start fucking with life, you know? I talked to his dude. He was just listening to the OP and Anthony Show and what his face was on. Nicholas Cage and he was talking about the Black Rhino going extinct this year. And I was telling us to do this and he was like, well, we could just bring it back, you know, if we were just fucking bring back the Black Rhino.

Yeah, can't they do that? I mean they thought they're talking about doing that right now. We're really mammoths. Yeah, but then it becomes the question of, okay, do we need rhinos though? No, we really need rhinos.

Did you see there's a video in Siberia of a bear walking across a stream with a fish in his mouth? And it's really blurry. And so people are like, it's a woolly mammoth in Siberia. And then other people are going, or a bear with a fish in her mouth. How can the woolly mammoth has a blue nose, right? Stupid fox?

You know what I really learned that when I did that game showing my head show. I did this show for CBS and what the show was was a game show with hidden cameras. And the way it worked was we would, I was the host and don't have a dude with a little earpiece and I was sending him out to a place and the cameras were already in place. Hidden cameras were in place. I go, all right dude, you ready? You go, yeah, I go, here's the deal. You're a reporter. and you are there for the biggest story of your life. There was a UFO over Hollywood and all these people saw it, but by the time you got your camera there and got it set up. all the people went away. So what you got to do is you got to find someone to get on camera with you and and talk about their UFO experience and you got to say you got to get them to say that they were abducted and probed. And they were like oh in the guys like okay okay all right here we go and it was immediate. It was immediate. It was like no one said no. He goes listen man. I'm a reporter for this and that. Here's a deal. There was just a UFO sighting. Do you think I could get you to come on camera and say that you saw it? Oh, yeah, yeah. And then people would just start talking. They would like well, it was bright silver and it was spinning over the over the hemisphere and what happened was and they did just give this legally like detailed accounts. Yeah. It's like at this point, people have been so poison. like pop culture and by the idea of UFOs like they can just recall they just they just have this like yeah frozen fake idea in their head from a hundred movies and they can just oh yeah I remember what happened in that movie I just read yeah oh um but it was lights and lights it's a detail they've seen it it's seen it a hundred times it was amazing yeah they just they just lied they just lied not only did they lie they lied and we're willing to sign a waiver saying that they lied and that we were gonna show it on TV incredible it was not

Just for that feeling. I think people, there's a lot of people that live lives of such shit. Yeah. They live sucks so bad. Yeah. That they almost believe what they're saying when they tell you some story about seeing Bigfoot. Sure. You know? Yeah. It's probably a bear and it was 20 years ago and they were scared and it was dusk and they were like, you made eye contact with me.

Yeah. And they fucking believe it, man. By the time 20 years have passed.

That never even real any holding. I told them. You know, your memories that you have from like anything more than like five years ago. What, what is that, really? Do you really, I mean, might remember some like really intense shit. Yeah. Barely. But barely. Yeah. But barely. I mean, you could recall data and information, but how much of that memory can you really pull out?

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Some dumb beyond dumb shit on memorabilia taking his memorabilia back with their presentation. Was that what it was the palestation?

That's my first people on the UFC. Really?

Wow, that's locals, right? Those are lots of CEOs. Yeah, that's locals and people from out of town that don't know any better. Yeah, that's the place, too, where like you, uh, or people actually like to gamble like to go to those places. They just like to gamble because they have better odds.

Yeah, because if you go to like the Balazio or just one of the big casinos, MGM grants, or something like that, they kind of, I think, you know, they're probably better at getting your money.

That's a quick man. It's weird. I've seen people lose hundreds of thousands of dollars. Really? Watched. Oh, yeah. Yeah. What's the date I've been coming to Vegas? I've been going to Vegas doing UFC's since 2001, 2002. That's when I started going to watch. 2001, I started going right after 9-11. I saw T.D. Ortiz take on Vladimir Matt, you shanko. That was right after September 11. You called that? No, no, no, I was in the audience. We were watching, yeah, I didn't work for them back then. I was just a fan. And so from then, you know, to 2012, I've seen some people throw some crazy money away. And just a weird place when you have one area where all the rules are different. One area, just one area. One area we can fucking drink whenever you want. One spot we got this spot and you can just fucking six o'clock at the morning and every drink. You don't ever have to leave your hotel dude. We got a giant hotel where you can wander around with world-class food here and everywhere you can gamble. If they had a strip club in the major hotels, it would really be the perfect place. The strip club and a pool hall had become never after you never have to go anywhere.

They probably would if they put it raise you know it would be too much too much too dark too. That can make people leave you know make people go somewhere. Yeah, but there's there's places they have in Vegas. They're like the biggest trip comes in the world.

So Feng Shui, the numbers of the floors are important. It's set up as important and there's things that aren't lucky. They make sure that they do it in accordance with what Chinese people think is lucky.

They said, any string right. That's right.

Yeah, well, that's because in their country you can get eaten by a fucking tiger, right?

Yeah, I always thought of it's the most depressing things terrifying and they attacked a trainer there once. Oh, right. Yeah. Yeah, there's this video of it. Lion attacks trainer at MGM. Yeah, it's pretty fucked up. Pull that shit up. See if we can find it. Yeah, I think my favorite is the Shark Tank at Mandalay Bay. That's the main most badass attraction. That's a dope ass aquarium setup. They have a huge tank filled with sharks and they have these cool ass jellyfish and the jellyfish are all like under these psychedelic neon lights and they're floating around. That's a badass fish tank. Yeah, it's a crazy video. Dude, it's a bizarre video. The MGM, the guys are in the tank with the La Putche Hand down so I can see The MJM guys are in the tank with giant male lions man and for whatever reason the lions is just like pitch. Here he gets up. I don't know what happens. He just finds a guy weak. You know, he's just a bit there. Just annoyed man. They're trapped in this fucking box with these little pink bitches that think that they could survive. Like why do you think you can stand next to a lion? I don't care if you raise that thing with a bottle. Look at the size. Look at it. Just a size that jacked the dude. Look at that man. Just a size of fuck that dude up for no reason. They're the female jumps in. And even if they're playing, even if he's playing, it's like whatever man. Look at him. He just goes after that guy for no reason. And that guy is like, oh shit. And the other guy for whatever reason he's listening to the other guy. So the other guy gets in between the two of them. And the lion chases them. The guy almost gets jacked. Wow. How scary must that have been? And people took that shit with their cell phones. Look at the size of his fucking head in all that crazy hair around him. What a nutty animal man.

Yeah. Well, nobody died, but it was a freak moment. And you know, they have that hair around their neck just so that other lions can't kill them. Oh, really? Yeah.

She might have been like, can I bite them, too? She got crazy. If some blood came out, she might have fucked them up, too. Because they're the hunters. The females are the hunters.

Pull that thing up. Pull that video up. Okay. So we can listen to it because it's not long. Right. And it's, it's just a judge in the Palatano. He had a show on Fox business where he would really be like super honest about stuff and, you know, really have an astute break down of how our political system really functions and how our the American public's been lied to from the beginning and the way he did it is by posing a bunch of questions what if this what if that what if and the way he does it man it's it's that's actually a different video that I was talking to this no that's a different video what you're talking about I'll find that

Well, no, that's that's he the other video was on that as well. I see the one that you just pulled up but the other video was being touted as something that got him fired as well. Apparently they were going to fire him no matter what and this was his his go out right, but listen to what he says that

So depressing that we're really in a situation where this is the situation. We're really stuck here. This is where we're at 2012. I don't know if that was its final broadcast but it was a very powerful one.

I don't know, man. I don't think they did. I think, you know, the look, people get fired for all sorts of different things all the time. I'm not necessarily sure that he got fired because of that. Right. You know, but that's definitely something he went pretty fucking with this guy getting fired on this show. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was pitch popular. It should be even more popular now. Well, the things that he said, they're going to take off on the internet. You know, that video was going to take off on the internet. It already is, right? What's the hits on it right now? 444,000. Yeah, and by the way, there's a gang of those. It's not just that one. Yeah, there's a gang of those out there. That's not just one person put it up on YouTube. Yeah, it's fucking powerful shit, man. He's absolutely right, too. I mean, how do you fire the government though? That's the Jesus. Something's going to happen though. Something's happening, you know, and I think the government's recognizing it as well, you know, this is going to be an adjustment. There has to be, because otherwise it's a dictatorship. You know, at a certain point in time when you're really not doing the will of the people at all and you're really are suppressing the people and you really are taking away liberties. You're really trying to turn this into a fucking crazy dictatorship. Yeah. It's really not much different than that.

after a certain age you realize it's not gonna happen well you realize they're not telling the truth if Obama wanted to say some really radical things he could have already said a you know Chris rock really did this really fascinating interview recently we said that he thinks that Obama was gonna wait until his second term then he's gonna do some crazy shit God, you know, that sounds like you're wishful thinking. You know, that sounds to me like you paid attention to what he has done almost irreversible damage that National Defense Authorization Act that treats the United States like a battlefield and allows indefinite suspension or detention of American civilians with no warrant. That's insanity. that you don't need that. We're not falling apart. We don't have violence in the streets every day. We're not in the middle of an Arab Spring situation. We don't have nuclear bombs dropping on our city. What the fuck are you doing instigating or pushing forward those kinds of laws and legislation? The number one thing that we're supposed to be about is the pursuit of liberty. It's supposed to be liberty and justice for all. That's how it ends, right? With liberty and justice for all. That's what we want. And you're taking away liberty. For what? For what? Are you giving us extra justice? Is that what you know? That's bullshit. It's what it is. It's 100% bullshit. It's not representative of the people. It's sad and it's got a change. Just how I was a change. I don't know, it scares a shit out of everybody, right?

So maybe even talk to us? Sure. Who probably lock us in jail?

His hair.

He's only got 55,000 followers. Free to watch. Yeah.

Yeah, Alex is going to do it. He'll do it when he's in LA again in Alex's funk and Kurt. If you have an Alex on our podcast, you'll get a view as to what's up. He's right about a lot of shit man. He's a soldier. He's out there fucking beat in the bushes. See a daily show.

Yeah. He has a whole studio in the whole. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Studio is pretty fucking impressive. It shows huge. It's enormous. There's a lot of people listen to it. Yeah. You know, it's all doom and gloom though, man. Yeah. I've seen I've seen clips of them. The best show we ever had was the time with Joey Diaz took over. Oh, I remember that. I remember that day. We've talked about it too many times in the podcast. Yeah, I should. I remember the most glorious things I've ever seen.

But you put not a creeper feel.

It's even worse. They don't even know you and you're making silly faces.

Yeah, probably. So you just decided to be a creep at this age?

So have you ever been around the one guy who can't not hit on a chick?

You didn't try to fuck her. Did you try to spoon her at all? I think so. Ooh, spoon. That's nice. I got the, like, You got a swat, I think. She swatted you, like it offered me. It definitely didn't happen.

Right. No, I was like, you try to settle into a new level and then creep slowly.

Whoa.

Yeah.

Alcohol, yeah, that's it. Yeah, alcohol. Not sober. Yeah. There's nothing sadder than having whiskey dig. Probably sad.

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Yeah, that because he's the fucking best dog. The doctor's dog. Oh, I thought you were yearn about Brian getting a physical. No. Yeah.

No, those lupos.

You would get it. What are you smoke cigarettes? You wouldn't you worry about them? No, but I just

Did you think that maybe if he jerked you off, you could come?

We can do that. We can do that. We can do that. We can do that. We can do that. We can do that. We can do that. We can do that.

So my name is not ethical.

All bright at the doctors. That's hilarious.

So what did he say about your lungs and cigarettes and stuff like that?

What do they check when they check your lungs?

And then I wanted to take pretty to die from cigarettes. I don't know man.

Some people are genetically just don't get it. I think so, man. Yeah. There's that story stories, right? Oh, I know.

That's why they were smiling. Yep. Yeah, I'm having it, man. Drinking everyday. Well, there was some thing that I read once. I don't know if it's documented, but that 100% of all people that live to be over 100 eat red meat. Really? Yeah. There's never been a documented case of a vegetarian lives to be over 100. That could be total horseshit. Don't you fucking crazy vegans don't you text me about that. Don't you tweet me? Yeah, the angry tweet, the angry dietary tweet. Yeah.

It's the quickest in the area. I think a lot of fiber involved. Yeah, you're gonna be really shit with that vegan diet. I love fucking a good vegan meal though. I love I had a few flexible meals. I drink that kale shake every day. That's fantastic.

Yeah, it's hard to get grass fed meat these days, man. Apparently all of it's getting consumed up in northern California all the hippies up there love it. It's yeah, y'all natural grass me Yeah, it's way better for you and these just go to Whole Foods and you don't have it. No, they're out of it a lot Really? Yeah because up north look there's only a certain amount of people that are growing grass head meat and it's become super popular lately So all these you know, it's more popular in Berkeley and San Francisco. I'm sure then down here in in in retardville. So they they can sell all of their their cows up there. Why ship them all the way down the Los Angeles? Yeah, so they're having an issue like last Tuesday the the Whole Foods near me didn't even get a ship and a grass fed me Wow, yeah, I have to go there on Tuesday to get the meat It's crazy.

Like a fuck yeah 100%. It's a totally different meat. It's a totally different animal because the the cow that is raised on corn their fat fucks. They're they're marbled and it's really delicious. Yeah, you know, it's it's really really fucking yummy because all that fat gets all like a rib eye from a corn. Yeah Cornraise cow is great because it's so juicy but it's not quite as healthy for you and it doesn't taste the same when you get a grass fed rib eye there's much less marbling and you got a crooked quicker because it'll dry out yeah it's there's much less fat in it so it's a it's you you see sort of serious better pay yeah got damn it's good though It's totally different. It's almost like a gamey animal. Not gamey. It tastes, you know, it tastes, uh, like buffaloes or something. Almost. Yeah. It tastes better. It tastes like you're eating a healthy animal.

Oh, that was nice. Grass fed beef, those supposed to be way healthier for you, too. It's something about the actual animal being healthy. that like a lot of guys I know a lot of fighters have switched to grass fed meat recently. My buddy Einstein who listens to us all the time is one of Eddie's black belts said his performance really started increasing when he upped his greens and unchanged to all grass fed meat really said big difference yeah yeah it's just healthier you know just make sense that your body would respond better if you're eating healthier animals yeah

Yeah, fucking out there. You eat your veggies and fruits. Fucking up our goddamn Mont Santo fruits and vegetables and crazy man fat fuck cows and our farm grown fish because all the fish in the ocean are dead. And you know, they said that the next 100 years is going to be the last wild fish in the world. And within the next 100 years, there will be no more wild fish in the oceans. What? Yep. Well, we'll have outfished the entire region. We have a lot of company oscillator. No, they think about it from an exponential growth point of view that there would be more people in a hundred years. You know, I mean, think about a hundred years ago, there was only like a billion people on the planet and how they're seven billion. So, right? It's crazy. What's it going to be a hundred years from now? It's going to be 30 billion. Where are they going to get all their protein from? A lot of it's going to be fish. It's easy to catch and they're going to, once they, you know, they're going to fucking just troll everything. There's a suck all that fucking fish out of there. They're going to eat whales. They're going to do everything they're going to eat. They're going to everything that humans can consume. And then a hundred years now we're going to have to figure it out.

Could you imagine if we actually kill everything in the ocean within a thousand years? If people lived to be a thousand years, why is that outside the realm of possibility?

There was something I tweeted earlier today about the garbage patch. That some lady went to the garbage patches in the middle of the Pacific Ocean for folks who don't know bigger than Texas There's a giant hunk of garbage all plastic that's kind of caught together in like this one swarm It's like caught up with I guess in them like the way the tides go is one area where it's collected, where it's enormous. It's bigger than the state of Texas, which takes like more than a data drive through. All right, so that's how much garbage is out there. And it's just getting bigger. And it's going to keep getting bigger forever. Yeah.

I think the plastic breaks down though. I think that's part of the issue is that the salt water breaks it down to like jelly like little particles and it's it's really fucked. It's not like just like stuff floating and you get scoop up. Yeah, it becomes like almost liquid. Yeah, it's fucked up man. It's like we're so creepy. You don't think about what we do. We kill all the rhinos. We fuck the ocean over. We eat all the fish. We throw our garbage in it.

Oh, yeah, sure. Manfills.

Stan hope and I filmed the the finale of the man show in a garbage dump. Really? Yeah, because the girls were trying to con us and to take them to an island. I think it was two of the girls that were in the old man show and we didn't get along with them so well.

And then we thought about it and Doug and I were like, we should do it at a garbage shop. And I was like, we think about it. I want to do it at a garbage dump in New Jersey. I want to do it like this. Stingiest, grossest dump. I said, you know, if you're at home and you're watching us, it's too assholes. Hang out with girls who never fuck you on, uh, you know, in a place where you can never afford to go to, you know, hang around the, why was that fun for you? Yeah. I go, be much more fun for you to watch us in a dump. Sure. So much fun. Yeah, too. So we yeah, that's what I felt like. Yeah, they were so mad at us. Oh, it was gross. And they're defense.

Yeah, they wanted to go garbage. Well, you know, it's, I don't blame a man. That culture, the hot chick culture of asking for things. Yeah. They would like, you know, rub the writers' shoulders and

Yeah, well, that was the culture of it. Yeah. Yeah. There was a lot of grossness going on, but sure. Not a none of those as gross as that garbage don't make it up for all of it. Like in foul. So bad. We're eating lunch and it's fucking garbage dust floating in the air. Yeah. Yeah. It was on Catalina. Catalina has a giant garbage. Do they really? Yeah, enormous. Yeah. I think I have a trip.

I think a lot of our garbage goes out there. That sucks. Yeah. It does suck. Catalina for folks who don't know is an island outside of the coast of Los Angeles. 14 miles off the coast.

Yeah, it's weird. It's big enough that you can actually live there.

And somebody died. Yeah. Jesus. Fuck off. It would have been you though, right? No. No, not me.

Would you live on Catalina? But if we got a giant piece of land in Catalina, and that's what we set up our compound.

We should, we should seriously look into a good place where we can all move. Just everybody. Outside of LA, but close enough, we'll just get a giant chunk of land. Get a few hundred acres. Yeah. All of us build houses there. Do you know how dope that would be if we could have our own like emni chamelama thing down to village? It would be awesome. Can we have a lake? I like like yes. How cool would it be for real? If we all we got everyone that we know that's cool and we decided we're all gonna be in some property and build houses there.

It's fucking awesome. If you lived down street in Christia was there and you could hear. Yeah, Eddie Bravo lived up the hill. The band lived down the hill and Duncan lived over there and already lives over it. That would be fucking awesome. That would be awesome. Yeah. That's how fucking cults get started though. That's what happens.

By the way, I'm doing I just realized I'm doing a fucking 420 show. I'm doing a 420 show in Atlanta. Where's that place I'm doing at Bryan? Is it on my Twitter thing? It just is a land journey Twitter doesn't want to pull up on my laptop. It looks weird man when I try looking at Yeah, I'm doing some I'm doing some plays in Atlanta some high time for 20 though. It's 420.

Yeah, I did what Jesus Christ is like it's up to call the Tabernacle and the child You might be the silliest goose of all goose is Tabernacle Yeah, but that's on 420. I want to I want to do my special there, but I don't also have enough time, but it would be the place to do it because the you know Atlanta fucking crowds are awesome all the way one of the most unburated cities in the country for sure and they have a great comedy community. There's that too. Yeah, great online Atlanta has a great community. I love the laughing school I haven't been. I heard that's great too. I heard that's great.

By the way folks, we try to do the ice house whenever I'm in town. March is going to be the shit. We're going to do a gang of them in March. because I'm home a lot in March. We're going to have a lot of fucking ice out shows. We're going to do a lot of full weekends Friday and Saturdays whenever we can. But Tommy Bonds will be involved in this. Yeah, man. Fuck you.

Oh, and you're going to be one of the comedy works in Denver. Yes. One of the greatest clubs in the history. I'm doing there's two clubs. I'm doing the South Club. That's great also. Yes. That's awesome, too. That's the, uh, that's a bigger place. They have an alkeny. Yeah, they do.

When is it? We hit weed somewhere in that place. Oh, really? Yes. Look, guys, we're gonna find it next time we're gonna come to my show and look for the weed. And we're, say the game, the dates again. The dates again? Yeah, wow.

Yeah, you gotta go.

If you never seen Tommy, he's way funnier as a stand-up than he is talking on a podcast. Don't be confused. He's kind of like, oh, he's kind of sexy. Yeah. I find his voice sexy. Yeah. Hey, you told me, but so anyway, folks, 24th 25th 26th. No, just 24th 25th. I mean, I'm there 23rd to 25th, but the recording is the 24th and 20th. Who's putting out your CD?

That's what I wanted. Folks for real, the Tommy's hilarious. You know, Tom and I met a long time ago when I was doing the Maxim tour with Charlie Murphy and John Haffron. And what we do is we go to these different places and they would have like a local guy open up for us. Everyone that opened up for us is really funny. It was really good like local talent because it was the maximum Bud Light comedy tour and they really did a good job of casting the local guys. But when we did Phoenix Tommy wasn't even local just somehow another he got involved in this and he was one of those guys where he he went up and I went holy shit I go this guy's fucking funny and it was dark and it was really well written and

Yeah, come out. Come out.

Well, Colorado's my my place. Everybody knows that. I fucking love Colorado. If I could convince my fucking crazy wife eventually I will be back and Colorado's a shit that place calls me I'll be back That club Wendy is awesome. She's my favorite club owner in the history of club owners. She's she's awesome. She's in she owns and runs both of them. She's just a badass woman. Cool as fuck real fan of comedy. A real friend to comedy. You know, she has an open mic program that's better than anybody's in the country or anybody's I've ever been involved with ever in my whole time in comedy.

They're great. They're great.

She takes care of guys, she pays them well, her food is great, especially in South. South she has a gourmet restaurant there. Oh, Jesus, it's fucking phenomenal. God damn I love Colorado. Snow in his fuck there though, 80 degrees here, suck it. But snow is awesome when you don't have to go anywhere. Remember those times when you go out your back porch and you just fucking hear nothing. Yes knowing that the way sound just gets absorbed and snow. Yeah, I love it. It's a great fucking time.

I like visiting it too. I would like to get a house somewhere where it's cold, you know, where I could visit on occasion and you know, I just have to get some more baller money. But now I'm fucked because it looks like fear factors can have fucking bite it. What? Why? It's over.

You just dropped that much down. Well, there's a bunch of issues. I think some of the one of the issues is let's be honest. It's a bit low bro. And NBC is trying to have quality programming like the office. Are you serious? I think so. Yeah, I think there's issues. You mean if the numbers have it? Yeah, they haven't decided yet. They look, they've got a point man. You know, I see what you were trying to do. You know, I know Hayton. I love doing it just because I love the guys that I work with. I love David Herwoods and Matt Cunance and Rupert and all the people that are all Rupert Thompson and the director. The other people that I worked with were really fucking awesome people. They're really fun to be around. It's like a family. And I missed them. You know, the five years that I didn't work with them and then I'm working with them again for this really short season. It was really fun. But it's not my favorite thing to do. I'm good at it. I've been doing it for a long time. I know how to host a game show, but I prefer doing stand-up and work for the UFC in this.

And the other thing was, I was telling them that the donkey loads were too much. I was like, you can't do this. We can't do this. Yeah, me see it proved it and be see it proved it and I was like just because they approved it doesn't mean you should be doing this like seriously. You can see that when I'm the voice of reason I'm the one it's telling me we're going too far. That's it. Yeah, like what is happening here? It's just they got a little crazy. Do you want to have an awesome show? You know, whatever it was it was a fun thing while lasted and I honestly believed that these new episodes were better than any of the ones we ever did before.

I watched it the other day. It was not good. But it's hard. It's hard to do a good sitcom. It's hard to do a right. I heard she's a funny stand-up. I've never seen her perform before. But I heard that Chris Lee is a funny comic as well. But he's a Brian. I've never seen him as funny as well. So how is it that they can have two really funny people and not have a funny show? A lot of times this is too many cooks in the kitchen, a lot of times they're trying to accomplish something, trying to get a vibe going, they're trying to find their footing. They believe in it though, because they renewed it, they renewed it for another season. Oh, did they? They're both funny people. Yeah, both funny people. Well, it takes a while, man. I really enjoyed my time on news radio, but I got a real deep respect for the craft of creating a television show. You know, and that's one of the reasons why I never did it again. One of the reasons why I never did it again was first of all, I knew that the guys that I was working with were incredibly talented and it's such a Paul Sims, the executive producer, was such an interesting and intelligent guy, and his sensibilities were so out there. I knew that after working with him, it was going to be really hard to do another sort of sitcom, a real mainstream, even if it's like a successful one. It's hard to do crap, you realize that

Everything.

Yeah. I prefer, you know, I shouldn't say it's everything because good writing was shit delivery and shit comics and shit actors is not good either. Right. It's a huge part of the problem and a part of the equation, rather, and you need real eccentric to write, I mean, one of the things that these guys were, they're not a form. There's a couple of them that were stand-ups. you know that we're on the on a staff but for the most part there were just really bright silly guys yeah who knew how to put together something funny it's fucking rare the very Matt stolen and trade parker there's there's a hundred pretenders you know at least for sure yeah any more you can get caught on one of those sitcoms were you just like you're reading the script and like what the fuck am I doing man yeah

People don't respond to it. And that's Paul. Yeah, I mean a lot of times it's who's the production company and what kind of pull they have with the network where they decide to put the show. I would definitely do another acting gig. I really enjoyed doing that movie with Kevin James because you keep a movie. That was a lot of fun. But it was mostly fun because Kevin and I have been friends since we were really young and to do a movie. Even though it was a silly kids movie. It was fun. It was fun to act. It was fun to do the thing with Leslie Bibb and the chick from Talladegan night. So I was like, this is kind of crazy. I'm acting with the girl from Talladegan night. And I hadn't done any acting in fucking 10 years. So it was weird. That was fun. I would totally do something like I was totally do a sitcom or something fun acting. But for the most part, one of the weirdest things about being a comic is that everybody wants to put you into some acting situation where you're going to do something that's not nearly as funny as you're acting.

Yeah.

Yeah, I've got to sometimes sometimes to get mad. You know, I got you at one time too.

Everybody laughed at it.

Well, he's throwing him through that. You know, whatever it was, saying it's rude, he's an idiot. That was one of the coolest things about news radio is that Paul Sims would let us make up entire scenes. For scenes didn't work, Dave Foley was like the secret producer on the set. He would just like rewrite a scene. Really completely do it, definitely. Dave Foley is a genius. His ability to like, see scenes and see jokes and see like, you know, his sketch background from kids in the hall and created a lot of sketches. It was a great writer. Awesome, you know, he got off track with his life and you know, he had a lot of hard times we had him on the podcast once talk about as a fascinating, fascinating story of caution, a cautionary tale, you know, if what could happen if you're involved in terrible relationship because wrong, you know, you have a spiteful ex-wife and poor guy, man, it's really horrendous. You know, and that led to all sorts of other issues as well, but as a writer and as a like a guy who's like as a comedian, he's a genius town to the guy.

Just a brilliant, really interesting funny guy. Really smart guy. You get him back on. Yeah, I love to have him back on. He helped his comedy because I haven't heard anything about him. Yeah, for him.

Well, I know that he had some setbacks. I mean, he can't go to Canada at all. If he goes to Canada, they'll rest him now. That's crazy. Yeah, he was like some crazy amount of money. Then he had a show that took off for a little while. He had a got like the pilot got picked up. Then it got canceled.

It is dude. The world of trying to create a sitcom is not fun. Yeah, and the odds of you in there's so many people all they're trying to do it.

Well, not only that, by the way, they will never let you create your own show. Right. Because if you create your own show, you own the show. If you own the show, that's fucking billions. They have that thing locked down. The only people who can own shows and have be show runners and be executive. Those people are already deep, deep, deep in the business. It's just very little room for some new guy who creates his own show. You know, they have to be paired up with some dude who's ready. The production company, they know what's at stake there. You can't just come to them independently and say, hey NBC, my name's Tom Scorby. My buddy, we wrote a sitcom. I'm going to be the creator and executive producer. He's going to be the director. Is that cool with you? Yeah, you guys are creative. Come on in. No way. Because that's a money train. They're giving you a free ticket on the money train. You know, you get like some rose-and-style syndication money or science-held syndication money. They know what's involved in that. It's a successful show. So they got they got that situation all locked up. That's one of the reasons why so many of those shows suck. You know, they got the same dudes feeding people the same slopp. You know, there's like if you look at like the show runners of a certain like hit shows, there's like like a two and a half man. That dude does like a gang of them. The one that tried to show is brought brawling with. Yeah. That guy does like the fuck. He does how you make big things. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. He does magic with that makes ridiculous money. Yeah. He's got it locked up. Wow.

When you've loved to see the arguments with him in Charlie Sheen on DVD, I'm gonna be great if so many film them. Somebody on the two and a half men set filmed some of the arguments.

Fuck, I wish I would love to see that. We just have to wait to. Yeah, on time. Egos, man. You know, I think that's the guy who also got, uh, do you remember Brett Butler? Do you remember her? Mm-hmm. Do you remember when she was a big TV star? She had a, that she had a show. Yeah, she had a show. Who was a show? I remember her. Yeah. What the fuck was that show? Yeah. Got damn it. Was it Brett Butler show?

No. Oh fuck, man. Grace under fire. Grace under fire. Well, she was like, she was, you know, she was fucking big time, man. You know, she was the star of a sitcom. Yeah. And she apparently just got crazy ego bullshit went through. And she threw a soda in his face and said, if you fuck your wife the same way you wrote, no wonder why she left you. Whoa, yeah, and that was it. They pulled the plug on that bitch. Now she's homeless. Yeah, now she's vanished off the face of the earth. I mean, she was an enormous star. Yeah. She was enormous man. And she was also an enormous star as a stand-up comedian. You know, she was really charismatic. You see, in the homeless picture, over? She's on an interview, right?

Oh, my God. Yes, dude. Pull that up. I want to see this video. Yeah, it says the golden-loved nominated actress who struggled with drug addiction went broke after a 1993 the 1998 Sincom ended its run on ABC. Oh my god, she made this crazy Brett Butler T two T's you serious one T and Butler Oh my god, the actress, a golden globe nominee for a role in 1993 1998 comedy series struggled with substance abuse while starring on the show, which was in the top 10 for two seasons. The Chuck Lori created show. was canceled in 1998 after she was asked to leave the set because of her drug use. Yeah, she threw a drink in his face. My friend was working on the set. He also worked on one of one of the shows that I worked on on news radio and he said, she, you know, he said in her accent, you fuck your wife. Same way you read it.

She creeps me out. She had hooked on drugs. She creeps me out, but you know who creeps me out. Just as much to Lady talking to her. I don't feel like I know anything about her while she's talking. She's pretty. Oh, she's beautiful. She's beautiful. She seems real nice. I don't know. God damn thing about her. I don't know.

Do you remember the first time you bought drugs? I don't remember. I told you that you had a story.

Yeah.

Because I want to say why Pete just sell it to you. Why does he have to take you on the trip to the guy's house?

We're filming fear factor. We're actually filming the playboy playmate edition of fear factor. Downtown area. And we're watching people sell drugs, smoke crack, right there. We're in a crane. And we're like, look, they're smoking crack. And the girls like, oh my god, they are smoking crack. This is ridiculous. No one's protecting us.

Can you fix book, pop, pop? But that would be the next person that makes a perfect Twitter account.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah. That's terrible shit, man. When I was a kid when I was in high school, we used to go to Dorchester to eat like late at night. I was hanging out with this one kid. I lived in Jamaica Plane before I went to high school. And Jamaica Plane was like a real, shifting neighborhood. It was kind of kind of creepy. Yeah, and it was it borrowed some really creepy places and I became friends with a couple of those kids and I stayed in touch with them and then when I went to high school I went to visit them a couple times before I realized it was really fucking dangerous Yeah, they were going to a bad high school man their their high school situation my house high school situation was very different Yeah, we went to the same middle school together and middle school was kind of okay because kids were young they hadn't gotten a dangerous shit yet and you know, this is 1980. Yeah, this is early. It was like when the sugar hill gang would just come out hip hop Hey, but to the hip hop, that was the first rap music. It was very friendly in retrospect. And things changed radically, though. When I left, I went to Newton, which is like nice suburbs, and I lived across the street from a river, and there was like woods near me and shit like that. And they went to the inner city high school. And they had some fucking tough times, man. I watched those dudes. They were basically involved in just just crime was everywhere around them. It was nuts, man. You know, inner city shit is just no fun at all. And I got lucky that, you know, my parents, I mean, moved to a nicer place. And we, we would go to these places like late at night when I was hanging out with them. You know, we'd hang out with some of their friends and we'd go, like, we'd go to like, door chest or like, two o'clock in the morning to eat. And I, well, first of all, I couldn't believe we were the fuck let me wander around at 14 years old. Yeah, but we were in some place where there was bulletproof glass. They would sell you food, but it was through bulletproof glass. It was sandwiches. Yeah. And it was like a slot where you would slide the food under. Yeah. And it was like the worst fucking neighborhood you could possibly be in outside of Bay Route. Yeah. We're hanging out there and some goggles.

Like the size. Oh, I didn't pay for this shit. I'm like, let him go. Yeah. And like you see the guy like bluffed his way out of a free sandwich and he would walk off and it was eating it like right at the front door like blocking the door like a dog like he got far enough, you know, for he was away from danger and he was just with no regard for how it looked. He was just eating it blocking the doorway eating the sandwich. Yeah.

People come to Hollywood who think that they're going to come. We're going to go somewhere.

It was close to our fundraiser on the fire still piss the bitch out of the screen when you get the show. I got a fucking bounce. I gotta go do a show. Go bounce. Great improv folks tonight if you are around if you're anywhere near Braia. there's an 8 p.m. show tonight, break improv, Tommy Seguor, all up in this, but you're headlining, right?

You and your wife. Yeah, we can. So it starts when you get there. If you're late, you won't be late though. You leave your argument directions.

He got to go down and support Tommy when he is taping his new CD that will be in Denver at the Comedy Works South on February 24th and 25th. It's a great fucking club. Tell Wendy I said.

Yes, it's called your mom's house.

Your mom's house podcast with his lovely and talented wife.

And she'll be on the show tonight as well. That's the great improv 9 p.m. and of course next not next weekend, but whatever the fuck weekend it is. It is next weekend not yet. It's not this coming weekend with the next one 24th and the 25th Denver get on that shit. Thank you. Fire up Desquad in support Tom Segura. You are the fucking man. I love you buddy.

Love you.

Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you.

Love you. The plush light for sponsoring our podcast from the beginning from the very dark days of laptops and not knowing what the fuck we're doing as if we didn't start off today on the wrong channel Hey, we fucking we got a little slippery listen this is real There's not a lot of production value, but it's free, okay? Thanks to everybody's tuning into this fucking thing before we even get their sponsors You know, it's one of the coolest things in the world to have such an awesome fan base to have so many cool fucking people to connect with so many people to get all these messages from you guys like hey man this is what i've been looking for my whole life this shows change in my life to show changes the way i look at things you guys change the way we look at things to from twitter from all the cool links that i get sent to the amount of support that we get from our shows it to me is uh... that the coolest thing that i've ever done on my life as a contest you got the best fans if where i'm lucky i'm very very fortunate we we put out the right vibe and people respond and and and we put out this show for it's real it's you know what I'm saying it's like there's no bullshit no pretence it is what it is it's a hundred percent free and we love all you freaks and we just want to let you know that we this is not something I take for granted I've done a lot of shit in my career this is the thing on the most proud of for sure it's uh... you guys are most proud of the the whole The whole thing, everything behind it all the moment. I don't want to say movement. All the momentum behind it, all the shows. It's a humbling experience man when I do something like the Chicago theater and there's 3,200 people and everyone's screaming in cheer. It's really the greatest experience of my life. And we're going to keep going, bitch. We ain't going nowhere. Come see me. Yeah, go to Joe Rogodot now.

We're at the ice house and Friday. By the way, it's going to be a it's a very intimate show and it will sell out is we do them every week. There's only 85 seats and it's fucking awesome.

Oh, you're around this Friday as well. I'm in Orlando. You're in Orlando. Okay. That's it, you dirty freaks. Thanks to Fleshlight, go to rogan.net, click on the link for the Fleshlight, enter in the code name, rogan, and then go fuck yourself. Or go fuck it yourself. Thank you to onit.com, O-N-N-I-T, makers of Alpha Brain, new mood, shroom tech, sport, and shroom tech immune, all powerful, cognitive enhancing supplements, immune system, supplements, and endurance supplements, all good shit, all natural, all good for you, all explained at onit.com, O-N-N-I-T. Go to jowrogan.net, click on the Alpha Brain link, enter in the codename, rogue, and you will get 10% off your first order. I'm going to have that changed. for all your orders. All right, so you can always get a nice little discount. All right, you fuck it freaks. You know what? I love you. God damn it. Exactly. That's it. Small, that's heck. And I'll see you guys soon. Check out UFC tomorrow night. I won't be there, but it's going to be live from somewhere cool Omaha, Nebraska. Oh, Jake Ellenberger. He's from Omaha, and Diego Sanchez, and believe that's on FX.

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